Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents.

#children #job #society #mothers #fathers #course #parents

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It is true that raising children is an important task in our society. Personally, I believe that parenting courses are essential and effective to equip a parent for that task, and I

Add the comma(s)

, therefore,

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therefore

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agree that every parent, regardless of mother

and

Correct word choice

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father, is necessary to take a

course

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for that.

To begin

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with, the

first

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argument springs to my mind is that parenting

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course

Fix the agreement mistake

courses

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are essential for

parents

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to take up the responsibility to raise their children.

This

Linking Words

is because parenting is not a simple task but involves extensive skill sets.

Hence

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, it requires proper training to acquire those skills.

For example

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, how to use positive enforcement and negative punishment to shape a

child

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's behaviour. Without attending a

course

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and the knowledge of

child

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psychology and developmental stages, it is difficult for

parents

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to meet many challenges of rearing a

child

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. It is

also

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worth mentioning that

parents

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attending a parenting

course

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Change the verb form

are

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effective for enhancing home-school cooperation.

First

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of all, it is impossible to rely solely on teachers to cultivate a

child

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's virtues and develop their good habits. According to a study in the Education University of Hong Kong, better home-school cooperation between teachers and

parents

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is vital for nurturing the empathy and kindness of a

child

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Therefore

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, parenting courses with

teaching

Wrong verb form

teach

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home-school communication skills can prepare fathers and mothers

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to be

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Correct article usage

apply

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good

parent

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parents

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to develop a

child

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's personality and character. In conclusion, I believe it is necessary and helpful for mothers and fathers to take a parenting

course

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in order to equip them to be competent

parents

Use synonyms

Submitted by Peter Chan on Sat Jun 18 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Studies have shown that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave. Do you agree or disagree?

Poor nutrition and obesity is a problem in many developed countries, and some people believe that a tax on fast food would reduce the problem. Do you agree?

In some countries, more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this question?

English Learning, I'm looking to improve our relationship by setting some boundaries. Explain how you want to be treated in these sessions, using clear examples of your own to support the answer.

More and more people want to buy clothes, cars and other products from well-known brands. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?