Some parents bring their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this.

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There is no doubt that

games

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play an essential part in youth's childhood. The question is, dose parents providing their kids with an enormous amount of

games

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have more advantages or disadvantages? I personally believe that

toys

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are very important but should be in small portions. In the terms of advantages,

toys

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can have a positive effect if they were educational

games

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. The main reason given to support

this

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claim is that kids can have fun while learning helpful skills at the same time.

In other words

Linking Words

, if the child continues playing these

games

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he or she will be shaped to be a successful member of society. Another advantage is that the social skills will be developed

as a result

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of sharing their

toys

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with other toddlers of the same age and making friendships as well as growing a sense of teamwork and cooperation.

However

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, there is a number of negative sides that comes with buying huge amounts of

toys

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Firstly

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, some parents use

toys

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as an alternative to spending quality time with their offspring, mostly because of their long hours of job and the small amount of sleep. Resulting in creat a distance between them and their children.

Secondly

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, a large number of

toys

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can be rather expensive. And kids will tend to get bored with

toys

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after a period of time. In other terms , waste of money. To conclude, I think that

games

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should be bought for children but preferably being educational to help have a great impact on the child's future success and

also

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to shape their social skills. ,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

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However

Add a comma

,However

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it should be in moderate numbers.

Submitted by fey135790 on Sat Jun 18 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Some parents bring their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

more and more people in their free time are doing dangerous activities such as mounting climbing. What might be the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some feel that students should not have to take standardized tests in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The illustrations show how chocolate is produced. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Some people believe that the government should fund art and culture, while others think that it should only fund sciences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Governments should support care vs. finance for retired people while others believe that they should save money when they get older. Discuss both views and give your opinion.