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Writing Samples /
Band 7

More and more young people from wealthy countries are spending time in communities in poorer countries doing unpaid work such as teaching or building houses. Why is this? Who benefits more from this, the communities or these young people?

#people #countries #time #communities #work #houses
Charity and voluntary work have been used by the wealthy families of the
first
-class community definitely a helpful source for the unlucky
people
 in every country.
This
 can be done with the alliance of local non-profit organisations or government
services
.
Nonetheless
, It can
also
 be voluntary and
this
 is beneficial for both parties. The following paragraphs intend to discuss the reason in detail. The competition in getting a prestigious university is tougher and more difficult nowadays. Application reviewers often need candidates to submit research or experience in a unique subject. So candidates can use the unpaid work experience that they get from rural community
services
.
This
 extraordinary service on the subject of kindness will always be noticed by the university and may boost the chance of getting shortlisted.
Furthermore
, Social media is another reason why
people
 target charity
services
 in undeveloped communities. In the current era, Kindness or the mind of giving will get more attention than anything else. So
people
 especially the youth choose to travel within their countries sometimes even beyond the border with running cameras to shoot the life of the poor and the kind
services
 that they are giving to them,
such
 as education, accommodation, etc. In doing
this
, some
people
 become celebrities on social media. To conclude,
although
 it may seem that only the wealthy
people
 gain profit from charity
services
, the local community and the government
also
 equally get benefits. While the poor get support for their basic needs, the government can spend the funds for other developments in the country.
Moreover
, the country's situation will be publicised on social media which will bring more attention to the connected global village.
Submitted by rijoshjoywyd on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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