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Band 5

In some countries people spend long hours at work. Why does this happen? Is it positive or negative development

#countries #people #hours #work #happen #development
In
this
 fast-moving world, the working style, culture and duration
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 changed. There are some nations in which
individuals
 are engaged
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their
work
 for a long period of
time
. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 we will discuss the reasons for that and the benefits and
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
 of the above
trend
.
To begin
 with, in some developing nations only young
individuals
 spend more
time
 at their
work
. The Major reason is,
in
Correct word choice
that in
show examples
 developing countries most of the citizens are poor, to support
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
 daily needs they are involved for a long
time
 at their
work
.
Furthermore
,
maximum
Correct article usage
the maximum
show examples
people
Correct quantifier usage
number of people
show examples
 who spent
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
time
 at their
work
 are young because the blood is hot they run more while compared to older people to support their families in
such
 a way to healthcare, education and other things.
This
 is the reason why
individuals
 spend their maximum
time
 at
work
.
On the other hand
,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
productivity has been increased due to the
time
 spent by citizens at their
work
.
The companies
Correct article usage
Companies
show examples
 and organisations are
Correct your spelling
yielding
yeilding
Correct your spelling
yielding
 more profit with
this
trend
. The companies are running for 24 hours in shift basics.
Moreover
,the government
also
yielding
Wrong verb form
yielded
show examples
 more profit
by
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the taxes of
organisation
Fix the agreement mistake
organisations
show examples
 and the GDP has increased.
In addition
, the nation is developing at a faster rate.
For instance
, In a recent survey, it is shown that
Change the capitalization
India
show examples
india
Change noun form
india's
show examples
 GDP has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased by 10% due to the productivity of
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
show examples
 field, where
Correct your spelling
individuals
individulas
Correct your spelling
individuals
work
 more than 16 hours
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a day. Nowadays, there are some drawbacks
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
trend
 of working long hours.The major issue in
this
trend
 is health issues.The mental and physical health of the
individuals
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 disturbed.The death rate
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
Correct your spelling
increasing
increaing
Correct your spelling
increasing
 due to the
strees
Correct your spelling
stress
streets
 attained by the
individuals
.
For example
, in
recent
Add an article
a recent
show examples
 survey taken by
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 hospital , it is shown that
individuals
 spending their maximum
time
 at
work
 are becoming
more weak
Replace the words
weaker
show examples
 both
physicaly
Correct your spelling
physically
 and
Correct your spelling
mentally
mentaly
Correct your spelling
mentally
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
compared to others. To conclude,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
 are both sides
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 aspect of
invloving
Correct your spelling
involving
 more
time
 at
work
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
show examples
side
Add a comma
,side
show examples
Correct your spelling
individuals
individulas
Correct your spelling
individuals
 need to support
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 families,county development and
organisation
Replace the word
organizational
show examples
 growth.On the negative side, the health issues.In my point of view,It is
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 development, at
first
 heath is more important.
Submitted by subeash.r on

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  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prevalent
  • economic pressures
  • financial stability
  • competitive job markets
  • corporate cultures
  • stigma
  • demonstrate dedication
  • advent of technology
  • blurred the lines
  • accelerated career progression
  • dedicated employee
  • significant negative implications
  • stress levels
  • mental health
  • physical health
  • social and family time
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • flexible working hours
  • work-life balance
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