IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Countries ate becoming more and mote similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world.

#countries #mote #people #products #world
It is true that globalization has made the world a global village.
Thus
, the nations become more and more similar as the global market spreads out widely and everybody has access to easily buy everything they want at any time and anywhere.
This
 issue has beneficial sides while there are negatives either, and both sides will be debated in the following paragraphs . According to the progression of high-speed technologies, online marketing has become more popular and reachable
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 every part of the world.
Hence
, people can purchase all the items and amenities they desire through the internet even though the products are established
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the other side of the globe. Increasing similarities among countries
reduces
Change the verb form
reduce
show examples
 the cultural diversities and
discriminations
Fix the agreement mistake
discrimination
show examples
to
Change preposition
among
show examples
 individuals.
Moreover
, it has lessened the boundaries between nations and the whole world seems to become
united
Correct article usage
a united
show examples
 one.
On the other hand
, every nation has its own nationality, culture, traditional
heritages
Correct your spelling
heritage
show examples
 and symbols. Tending to
similarity
Add an article
the similarity
show examples
 among countries makes their distinct features which have existed from the very beginning.Citizens wearing the same trendy clothes and cities having similar infrastructures would lead to
disappearance
Add an article
the disappearance
show examples
 of patent characteristics of nations. In conclusion, since benefits and disbenefits always come as a package, there might be some drawbacks
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
indicated
Add an article
an indicated
show examples
 opinion too.
Nevertheless
, it is clear that
developing
Replace the word
development
show examples
 in merchandising aspects
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 a lot to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 people’s desires and
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 the earth
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
become one family as we all are just the same humans with no exception.
Submitted by heinhninwutyi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: