New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time #outweigh

It is obvious that

children

nowadays spend their leisure

time

differently from in the past because of technological development. In my opinion, though

this

change brings pros and cons, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. On one hand, new

technologies

provide a wide range of entertainment sources which satisfied all

children

’s interests. There are various types of online games available whose designs are attractive and interesting.

Besides

children

are able to enjoy music videos, cartoons and comic books on free popular platforms

such

as Youtube or Discord.

Furthermore

, the fact that almost all of these

technologies

are easily accessible is undeniable. Kids are allowed to use smartphones or computers connecting to the internet in their own house, by which they are capable of accessing

Change preposition

apply

show examples

entertainment

technologies

at any

time

without any payments.

On the other hand

technologies

isolate

children

from their real life. Even though

children

seem to connect with friends 24/7 despite long distances,

technologies

nearly eliminate

time

spent face–to–face with real ones.

Children

spend enormous

time

chatting

Change preposition

show examples

virtual environments

such

as messenger, Twitter or Instagram rather than having conversations and sensing authentic emotions through friends’ voices or facial expressions. Being at one with nature is

also

an extraordinary experience many people miss out on during childhood due to new

technologies

. Remarkably, recent

technologies

are developing at

such

a brisk pace that parents could not keep track

Correct pronoun usage

themof

show examples

. It is inevitable for kids to be exposed to harmful content including violence or inadequate behaviour. In conclusion, while the advantages of technology in human life are great, we could not refuse their huge negative impacts on

children

Submitted by nguyenphuonganh01091995 on Mon Jun 20 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

advantages
disadvantages
new technologies
children
free time
access
educational resources
information
development
key skills
enhancing
creativity
imagination
opportunity
connect
convenience
flexibility
lack
physical activity
potential
health issues
impact
social
emotional development
exposure
inappropriate content
addiction
dependency

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that death penalty is the only way to decrease the rate of crime. while others believe that there are other better ways. Discuss both ideas and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.