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Band 6

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?

#places #homes #space #countryside #people
Nowadays there is a high demand for building new shelters. According to some
people
 the priority should be protecting the
countryside
 and building new homes should be prevented. I oppose
this
 ideation and think that individuals should allow the authorities to construct in
rural
Add an article
the rural
show examples
 side when needed. To start with, the main reason to build in
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
 as an alternative is
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
 the population has been increased dramatically in the recent years. On top of that, most of the cities are out of space to accommodate all the citizens.
For instance
, in Dubai, the government had to create two artificial islands on the sea to cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with the increasing number of its residents.
This
 was one of the solutions to resolve
this
 problem and unfortunately not all the countries have enough budget to mimic their action.
Thus
,
people
 will have a place to live and move out to the
countryside
 when possible.
Moreover
, the rural side would be updated with the country system and can respond to
society
Change noun form
society's
show examples
 demands.
This
 is because
all
Change preposition
of all
show examples
 the renovation that might occur in the aforementioned. In fact, all the new
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 would have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern architecture and facilities that will attract
people
 to leave
unpleasant
Add an article
an unpleasant
the unpleasant
show examples
 situation of their city and move their
employment
Replace the word
employees
show examples
 to the
countryside
.
Hence
, the
countryside
 would have the financial support that
needed
Add a missing verb
is needed
show examples
 from their government and equal distribution of the population will occur. To conclude,
although
 some
people
 think that it is more important to guard the
countryside
 by opposing new home construction, I strongly believe that the advantages of not
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
 so
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 more than the drawbacks.
Submitted by Simsima161 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Ecological benefits
  • Biodiversity conservation
  • Carbon sequestration
  • Sustainable development
  • Eco-friendly building materials
  • Green architecture
  • Government policies
  • Urban sprawl
  • Infrastructure
  • Smart planning
  • Agricultural lands
  • Rural areas
  • Population growth
  • Environmental sensitivity
What to do next:
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