Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some groups of society think that it is beneficial for
children
’s development thought have outdoor
activities
rather than playing computer games. I agree with
this
statement with my explanations below as well as providing examples to support my views. To commence with, it is obvious that
children
can learn self-discipline and interaction with people when they join in group
activities
with other
kids
of different ages.
Therefore
,
children
can learn how to follow rules and respect other
kids
. Discipline and respectfulness are the most important elements for
children
to cooperate with people in different roles and ages, which help them to become successful people in the future. What is more, some researchers found that the intelligence of
kids
who always play outdoor
activities
is higher than
kids
who always stay at home to play computer games.
Secondly
, playing outdoor
activities
improve
children
’s mental and physical health as well. Without enough interaction and connection with friends,
children
feel much more pressure because they cannot release their stress.
Also
, there is no doubt to deny that having sufficient exercise would have a great improvement of
children
’s physical health.
For instance
, the Hong Kong government encourages
children
should have 30 minutes in having outdoor exercise every day.
Children
having enough outdoor
activities
would decrease the risk of suffering from obsesses, high blood pressure, and cancer. In conclusion, I put more weight on
children
having outdoor
activities
instead
of playing computer games. It is beneficial for
children
’s development in both physical and mental health.
As a result
, it is suggested that the government promote some outdoor
activities
in school to create an atmosphere to encourage students to participate in outdoor
activities
.
Submitted by sarasasa19 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical development
  • Overall health
  • Coordination
  • Foster
  • Social skills
  • Teamwork
  • Mental well-being
  • Creativity
  • Exploration
  • Strategic thinking
  • Problem-solving
  • Hand-eye coordination
  • Sedentary lifestyles
  • Social isolation
  • Moderation
  • Balanced approach
  • Detract
  • Obesity
  • Poor posture
What to do next:
Look at other essays: