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Band 4.5

Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. What are the reasons and solutions of this?

#childhood #obesity #countries
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Obesity amongst
children
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 has been a mounting concern for many countries. While it has various complex causes, I can propose several feasible methods
in
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for
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 tackling it.  Childhood obesity is caused by a combination of factors. Primarily, because of
current
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the current
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 sedentary lifestyle, people, as well as their
children
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, spend their time watching television, playing video games and checking messages, all of which deprive them of physical activity.
Children
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also
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 commute to school by different means of transportation as opposed to walking on foot.
Moreover
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, as fast food products are cheap and easily available,
children
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 tend to eat them more than healthy foods, thereby accumulating more weight due to chemical additives.
Thus
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, these core reasons should not be overlooked.  
Nevertheless
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, the issue can be dealt with.
Firstly
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, parents should be held responsible to encourage their
children
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 to do regular exercise and walk to school.
Children
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 should be given consuming passion to have
athletic
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an athletic
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 build and to increase their longevity so that they can confront any health problems, including obesity. Another viable solution would be to strictly prohibit the sales of fast food and
such
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 kind of detrimental products
for
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to
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 the youth. Alternatively, the government should step in to make healthy foods affordable and
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accessible
accessable
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accessible
 near the schools. Clearly, these approaches are logical and reasonable. In conclusion, the main reasons why increasingly more
children
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 are getting overweight are linked to inactivity and fast food consumption.
Nonetheless
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, by paralysing these key factors, the problem can be resolved, I think.
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dietary habits
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Processed foods
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Nutritional education
  • Obesity epidemic
  • Preventative measures
  • Health policies
  • Urban planning
  • Caloric intake
  • Metabolic health
  • Screen time
  • Physical activity
  • Junk food
  • Food desert
  • Body mass index (BMI)
  • Portion control
  • Mindful eating
  • Lifestyle diseases
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