Some people think that parents have a powerful influence in children’s life, while the influence outside the home plays a bigger part of children’s development. What extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #parents #influence #children’s #life #home #part #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

People

Use synonyms

have different views about the effect on

Use synonyms

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

life

Use synonyms

from

parents

Use synonyms

oppsed

Correct your spelling

opposed

to outside the

home

Use synonyms

.While there are some influences outside the

home

Use synonyms

, I believe that

parents

Use synonyms

is usually contribute

Change the verb form

usually contribute

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

life

Use synonyms

. The primary reason why

parents

Use synonyms

play a central role is they are the

first

Linking Words

teacher of their

Use synonyms

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

, which means they are teaching their

children

Use synonyms

everything from the

Correct your spelling

beginning

beggining

Correct your spelling

beginning

of their

Correct your spelling

lives

life

lifes

Correct your spelling

lives

show examples

. In other

word

Fix the agreement mistake

words

show examples

parents

Use synonyms

are not only the language

teachers

Use synonyms

or maths

teachers

Use synonyms

Add the word(s)

but,

show examples

they are

also

Linking Words

the

life

Use synonyms

teachers

Use synonyms

children

Use synonyms

Parents

Use synonyms

who show

the

Correct article usage

show examples

good manner

from

Change preposition

show examples

daily

life

Use synonyms

will make their

children

Use synonyms

usually come out polite and grateful.

For example

Linking Words

, if a mother always

say

Change the verb form

says

show examples

thank you to other

people

Use synonyms

when she receives something, her

child

Use synonyms

must become a thankful person as well.

Furthermore

Linking Words

,since

children

Use synonyms

watch their

parents

Use synonyms

all the time when they were young, they imitate their

Use synonyms

parents

Change to a genitive case

parent's

parents'

show examples

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

and learn what their

parents

Use synonyms

do. It is very common to see that the dad and the

son

Change the noun form

sons

show examples

are both doctors or

teachers

Use synonyms

, which

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

fully

embody

Correct subject-verb agreement

embodies

show examples

the

influence

Use synonyms

from

Change preposition

show examples

parents

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

life

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, the

influence

Use synonyms

outside the

home

Use synonyms

Linking Words

also

Add a missing verb

is also

show examples

important to

children

Use synonyms

's development. When

Use synonyms

Add an article

the child

show examples

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

went to school, most of their time would be spent on academic lessons, which would play a big part in their development. They will

also

Linking Words

learn how to work with other

people

Use synonyms

for instance

Linking Words

, to write a group essay, they will learn how to deal with other

people

Use synonyms

and finish a project as a team, which will lead them to the real world. In conclusion, I agree the

influence

Use synonyms

outside the

home

Use synonyms

exists, but the huge

influence

Use synonyms

from

parents

Use synonyms

centainly

Correct your spelling

certainly

plays a bigger part of

Use synonyms

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

development.

Submitted by so163uh on Thu Jun 23 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
8
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Discipline
Emotional support
External influences
Peers
Media
Education
Technology
Social media
Role models
Socio-economic factors
Collaborative approach
Cultural differences
Fostering independence
Critical thinking
Upbringing
Values
Beliefs
Behaviors

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In this contemporary world , some universities students they want to learn additional subject to their main studies while other argues that more time should spend on studying for a qualification. This essay will acknowledge the validity of this statement and elaborates on my reason.
<4
band
You were supposed to go on an interview in a few weeks, but you have since found out you cannot go on the date arranged.
I am writing to express my concerns about not being able to be interviewed on the date arranged.
5.5
band
Since the beginning of 21st century internet has been changed dramatically and working from home has become common. While working in the comfort of home may prove to be a blessing, office workers have some unmatchable benefits. This essay will discuss why office goers could be more productive than people who choose to be home-sourced.
One of the most common approaches in the world since the beginning of Covid-19 is remote-working. At first, it was for the sake of safety and preventing the disease to spread. Then, after the invention of the vaccine and controlling the virus, It became a regular way of working all around the world. Remote-working has some benefits to both managers and office-workers, but it also has its downfalls, too. One of them is the productivity of the workers.
6.5
band
Some people consider corruption to be the root cause of problems in government organizations and politics. What problems arise due to this corruption? What are possible solutions to eradicate corruption.
Some people believe that corruption is the reason for issues in government establishments and political offices. There are some problems because of this which are unfair distribution of services and distrust among people. However, there are some possible solutions which help in eradicating bribery.
8.5
band
A local college is having an international day. You want to speak about your country to students from different cultures. Write a letter to the college head. In your letter: Tell him/her about the topics that you are going to talk about Explain why they would be of interest to the students Ask about any arrangements that you need to make to give the talk
I am writing this letter to talk about my country's valuable information to the students on an International day.

Some people think that parents have a powerful influence in children’s life, while the influence outside the home plays a bigger part of children’s development. What extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

You were supposed to go on an interview in a few weeks, but you have since found out you cannot go on the date arranged.

Some people consider corruption to be the root cause of problems in government organizations and politics. What problems arise due to this corruption? What are possible solutions to eradicate corruption.