You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #smoker #places

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In recent years, an increase in awareness of the harmful influence of smoking has been observed.

As a result

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, many people demand to ban smoking in public areas,

while

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others claim that it would be a too radical step. Each of these views has both pros and cons. A lack of permission to

smoke

Use synonyms

in public has many significant benefits. First and foremost, it would limit the occasions for smokers to

smoke

Use synonyms

. Many of them reach for cigarettes in their free time,

for instance

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while

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going to the shop or to work; if

such

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behaviour had been prohibited, they wouldn't have had so many opportunities to

smoke

Use synonyms

Furthermore

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, it would

also

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have a positive impact on their environment. Many individuals, especially non-smokers, suffer from

cigarettes

Change the noun form

cigarette

show examples

smoke

Use synonyms

in public areas as it may cause harm;

consequently

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, a ban on smoking would make the surroundings more friendly for everyone.

On the other hand

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, there have been relevant drawbacks too. The most significant of them is the fact that

such

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a ban won't help smokers quit. Individuals who

smoke

Use synonyms

are usually addicted to it,

thus

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, a prohibition in public places will not contribute to support them in their fight against the addiction.

Therefore

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such

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a law would be created only for the non-smoking part of society, disregarding the smoking ones, who need help to overcome addiction. In conclusion, I don't fully agree with the statement that smoking in public areas should be prohibited.

Although

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it can have a positive impact on the environment

as well as

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limit the occasions for smokers to

smoke

Use synonyms

, it is not created to help them overcome their addiction, which should be done

Change preposition

show examples

the first instance.

Submitted by kuba.glogowski on Mon Sep 30 2024

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task achievement

Consider incorporating more specific examples to strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Ensure consistency in referring to smoking and smokers, as minor variations might cause slight confusion.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, offering a balanced view of the topic.

task achievement

The main ideas are well-presented and generally well-supported, showing a good understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Childhood obesity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this, and how can the problem be managed?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists and not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people?

Employees sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree oe disagree?