The government should invest more money in teaching science than in other subjects for a country development and progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is crucial to decide which subject to teach to young generations as it decides the future of any country. So, it is usually suggested that the government should provide more funds to schools ,particularly for teaching
science
rather than other
subjects
for their growth and development. Personally, I disagree with
this
statement and
this
essay will
further
explain my disagreement in detail.
First
of all, it is evident that teaching
science
may require facilities that are costly.
Therefore
, it becomes compulsory for the management to spend more money on developing
science
laboratories.
For instance
, our University lab was equipped with lots of different machines and equipment which
costed
Wrong verb form
cost

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb costed. Consider changing it.

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a fortune to our trusty and so he was forced to accept donations from a government organization.
Hence
, it is obvious that
science
costs a lot of finance and
this
expense is justifiable.
However
,
on the other hand
, each and every subject are essential and should be treated with the same significance.
Although
, certain
subjects
are given utmost importance when it comes to deciding the development of a nation financially as well as politically, it is not necessary that
subjects
like art cannot contribute to its progress. To corroborate, countries like Paris, earn
its
Correct pronoun usage
their

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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majority of international income from running museums harbouring exclusive paintings and sculptures.
Such
, places do not completely reply
on
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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serious businesses for improvement of their economy. All in all, I do not concur with the notion that all the government investment shoulds be focused on educating people with
science
but, the money can
also
be diverted to teach
subjects
like arts which
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have

It seems that the verb has does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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potential
Correct article usage
the potential

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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to bring a lot of income for some countries.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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