Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for family and leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give the reason for your answer and include any relevant examples of your knowledge and experience.

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation #reason

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, with the increasingly competitive working environment, it has drawn much concern that plenty of people are working overtime, being less available for family and leisure activities. As far as I am concerned, the disadvantages of

this

Linking Words

trend overweigh the advantages. On the one hand, constantly working long hours will impose threats on both mental and physical health. Not being able to get abundant rest or relaxation is likely to put employees under great pressure, which has been identified by many scientists as a major cause of depression.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, a host of vocations involve working in front of desks, and without proper leisure activities

such

Linking Words

as outdoor exercises, people will suffer from sore backs or worsened eyesight.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, spending time with families plays an essential role in building intimate relationships since children need companionship from their parents to develop healthy personalities and spouses need time to share their thoughts to enhance the harmony of a family. Admittedly, longer working hours mean better opportunities for promotions. By accomplishing more tasks, individuals are able to absorb more professional knowledge and be more experienced in the practical field, increasing their competitiveness in the job market, especially in

this

Linking Words

day and age when there is a prevailing culture of working overtime in large companies.

However

Linking Words

, impairing health conditions and missing precious opportunities for being bonded with families can neither be justified by a higher salary nor a successful career. In conclusion, even though working long hours can be beneficial for a person’s economic situation and career development, health and family are cornerstones of a meaningful and satisfying life that are not worthwhile sacrificing.

Submitted by ray2013.mitbbs on Thu Jun 23 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Some people believe that governments must apply high taxes to provide good public services for everyone. Give your opinion.
In this day and age, it is undeniable that increasing taxation of goods and services should be allowed by authorities and governments for everyone. Personally, I partially agree on this statement. The supporting reasons will be examined throughout this essay.
5
band
Curiosity can be seen in many ways. Please share an example of how you have demonstrated curiosity and how that has influenced your growth.
As I mentioned earlier, when I was in the school era, I sell things that were trending at that time. Not only that, in the college era, I was working as an intern for 5 times. Starting from being a marketing team in a startup, project management, sales and business development, and the last one as a management consultant. Outside interning in some companies, I like to learn new things that are far from my specialization, such as coding classes and I found that I didn’t enjoy coding that much. From knowing that, I was satisfied enough because at least I know that coding is not my thing, so I can focus on my strengths. I kept tryring to find which specialization that suits me the most. Try another one and keep looking and trying new things. Luckily, later I realize that I actually like understanding every aspect, not in a deeper level, but I can connect the dots between all of it. As the more I understand myself, I can be more selective on which specialization that I want to focus on....
7.5
band
Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvanatges of being self-employed?
In recent times, there has been an increasing number of people who opt for being self-employed instead of working for a company. One of the noticeable rationals behind this trend would stem from in need for a flexible schedule. Nevertheless, there are two primary downsides of working for themselves such as unstable income and tough competition with other self-employers and companies.
6.5
band
There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
It is true that a rich variety of musical styles can be found around the world. Music is a vital
7
band
Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.
There is an argument whether the government should adopt an approach to add art subjects to the syllabus as an essential part of the curriculum or not. In my opinion, art subjects are same important as academic subjects such as mathematics, physics, and science. I strongly agree with this statement and I will examine it.

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for family and leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give the reason for your answer and include any relevant examples of your knowledge and experience.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people believe that governments must apply high taxes to provide good public services for everyone. Give your opinion.

Curiosity can be seen in many ways. Please share an example of how you have demonstrated curiosity and how that has influenced your growth.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvanatges of being self-employed?

There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.