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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries, people decide to have a child at a later age. Why is this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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In different parts around the globe,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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couples take a kid at their old age.
This
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 is because they want to earn a lot of money before having a child and in
this
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 way, they want to secure the
life
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 of their child.
This
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 essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of taking
such
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 a
decision
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 and will provide an
overall
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 opinion. Are there myriads of benefits of taking
such
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 a
decision
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? Certainly, there are. First and foremost, mature parents can take the responsibilities of a
baby
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 more rigorously.
That is
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 to say, they can
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
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 the basic facilities, say, education, health, and so on compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young couples because
the
Correct article usage
apply
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maturity develops over time.
Secondly
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, the
decision
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 to take a
baby
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 in later
life
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 will
also
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 indirectly help to reduce birth rates. Take, India,
for example
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, where
this
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 kind of
decision
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 will be surely considered a blessing where the population is a major issue. In
this
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 way, it can slightly contribute to knocking down the population problem.
However
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, the
decision
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 to take a
baby
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 in later
life
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 has some disadvantages. Actually, the reproduction rates decline with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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age.
For example
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, if a parent decides to take a kid at 35 years of
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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age means that they can not take another
baby
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.
In addition
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 to
this
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, women suffer greatly from maternity issues in their later
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 and even could be dead
due to
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 the child’s birth.
To sum up
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, it must be said that if a couple takes a kid in their later
life
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 they can raise it in a better way and it
also
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 indirectly
demolish
Correct subject-verb agreement
demolishes
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 the population problem even though they suffer from health problems. I guess the benefits of
such
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 a
decision
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 outweigh the demerits.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion effectively summarize the main points and provide a clear stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a more logical and cohesive manner. Use transition words and phrases to connect your ideas more effectively.
lexical resource
Enrich your vocabulary to express ideas more clearly and precisely. Avoid repetition and consider using a wider range of synonyms.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammatical accuracy. Vary your sentence structures and use a wider range of grammatical forms.
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