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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development
Smartphones
 and other technological gadgets today are considered to be a huge threat to
children
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children's
show examples
 cognitive and physical development by many people, as prolonged
exposure
 can lead to addiction and other adverse psychological effects.
Smartphones
 can provide
children
an
Add the preposition
with an
show examples
 altered reality with numerous attractions and games,
as a result
,
children
 consume
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
 amount of
screen
time
. In
this
 essay I will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of
this
 issue, I believe that
screen
time
 should be
absouletely
Correct your spelling
absolutely
 limited as prolonged
exposure
 will be only detrimental to young ones. Today, most of our daily activities and
Add a hyphen
work-related
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work related
Add a hyphen
work-related
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 earrings are related to
smartphones
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphone
show examples
 use,
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 quick
Correct your spelling
responses
responces
Correct your spelling
responses
 to important emails or attending meetings remotely.
Understandibly
Correct your spelling
Understandably
, early
exposure
 to
such
 devices can promote faster learning for
such
 a
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
.
Also
,
smartphones
 provide a rich and
user friendly
Add a hyphen
user-friendly
show examples
 source of information to users,
such
 as educational videos for
children
 streamed over Youtube.
On the other hand
,
excessive
Add an article
the excessive
an excessive
show examples
screen
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
 for
Correct your spelling
children
chidlren
Correct your spelling
children
 leads to less
time
 spent on physical activities or other extracurricular events,
thus
 leading to obesity and other related health disorders.
In addition
,
children
 using
smartphones
 for long hours have lesser social interactions with their peers,
consequently
 causing poor communication skills development and lesser chances to develop friendships. Unsurprisingly,
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
 showed
direct
Add an article
a direct
show examples
 correlation between depression and loneliness among
children
 spending too many hours on computers and
smartphones
. In conclusion, I believe that prolonged
exposure
 to
smartphones
 is harmful to
children
, causing physical and psychological disorders
such
 as obesity,addiction and poor communication skills. But controlled and strictly limited
screen
time
 is sometimes recommended for educational use.
Submitted by nadeem.hb on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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