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Band 6.5

Some people think that watching television does not make people smarter. Other people think that watching television can be informative. Which opinion do you agree with and why?

#people #television
For the past two decades, television has become
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
one of the most popular appliances in households. While some may argue that viewers can get
lot
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a lot
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 of information from these devices, others were
on
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of
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 the opinion that
TV's
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TV
show examples
 won't make them intelligent.
However
, I believe that people can make good use of televisions for educational purposes. I will detail my reasons in
this
 essay.
To begin
 with, it is important to look into why some people believe that
TV's
Change noun form
TV
show examples
 won't make them smarter. Foremost, there is a perception among the society that these machines can only provide entertainment for their users. A good example is,
certain
Correct word choice
that certain
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 parents may limit the time that their children
viewing
Wrong verb form
view
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 the
TV
 as they think that it only
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 fun time to the kids rather than educating them
a
Change preposition
on a
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new thing or two.
Moreover
, others may say that some
programs
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
TV
 will make
audience
Correct article usage
the audience
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 dumb as those
programs
 will not focus on the realities of life.
In contrast
, a majority of consumers have a different view on
uses
Correct article usage
the uses
show examples
 of television. In fact, they contend that modern
TV
programs
 offer more informative segments while making the viewers happier.
For instance
, there are channels specifically made to educate people on matters of science, economy and well-being.
Additionally
, there are
programs
 and events which were broadcasting on
TV's
Change noun form
TV
show examples
 that focus only on child development.
Furthermore
, televisions help with promoting social well-being by leading campaigns against many social-ill activities. In conclusion, it is clear that televisions can achieve ground-breaking results in the areas of mental and physical development of humans when using them more effectively by
priortising
Correct your spelling
prioritising
prioritizing
 knowledge lead programming.
This
 question, remind us of
importance
Add an article
the importance
show examples
 of television.
Submitted by malinda.mi20 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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