IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic Television injects violence in children, and programs with violent scenes should be banned. Do you agree or disagree with the statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#minutes #topic #television #violence #children #programs #scenes
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As a new parent, I completely agree with
this
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 statement that the current
television
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program
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 injects violence into children and the violent scenes should be banned. As a normal people, unlike the previous generation, the current generation is spending more of their leisure time in front of the
television
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 and
this
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 creates a huge business opportunity for the entertainment industry.
Therefore
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, the
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television
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the television
show examples
 industry is coming up with all types of
programs
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 to keep people engaged with the electronic screens. The majority of these
programs
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 have adolescent
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
, violent scenes, and content shows which would directly or indirectly support or object to the agenda or propaganda of various governments. As an example, I would like to discuss a wrestling
program
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 being globally telecasted for more than 25 years now. These wrestling shows are acted by trained professionals as per the entertaining scripts developed by the
program
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 operators. These shows are very well marketed amongst young kids,
although
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 they mention during the
program
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 that these wrestling moves must not be tried at home. The content shown in these
programs
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 is so intimidating for the children at home to try and at times it has caused serious life-threatening injuries to the young schoolgoers.
Nevertheless
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, there are many educational shows and
programs
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 available on
television
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, but the shows which have violent scenes or actions are grabbing the attention of young kids and these shows become commercially successful.
Hence
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, it is my opinion that a proper
television
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 sensor
program
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 must be operated by the authorities to reduce or control the violence shown on
television
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 and protect the future of our generation.
Submitted by msrinivas7866 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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