Some people think that schools should concentrate on academic courses which are useful to the career of students; courses like music and sports are not useful and therefore should not be offered. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued by some
people
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that academic
subjects
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should be focused on in school, and they think that extracurricular classes are not vital. I totally disagree with the statement because
sports
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and
music
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help in the development of overall required
skills
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, and it
also
Linking Words
helps to make their career. Non-academic
subjects
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such
Linking Words
as
music
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and physical activities put ample
skills
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in
children
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such
Linking Words
as physical
skills
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, creative
skills
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and social
skills
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that are essential for the overall development of the
children
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. If
children
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only focus on their academic
subjects
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such
Linking Words
as math, and science, it will give rise to a sedentary lifestyle so as result physical
skills
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will not be developed.
Moreover
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, recreational activities make
children
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more creative and can more socialize with
people
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.
For instance
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, it has been found that
sports
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people
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and artists are more creative, healthy and have more confidence in face-to-face conversation as compared to those who just concentrate on their studies. Another reason is that
sports
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and
music
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are equally important as academic
subjects
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is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
because many
people
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make their careers as artists and sportsmen and earn abundant amounts of money. Some
children
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only want to become singers, dancers or players and do not want to become scientists, doctors or engineers so if schools
also
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give importance to non-academic
subjects
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,
children
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will have more career opportunities.
For example
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, in an interview with times India, Harbhajan Singh, who is a famous Indian cricketer, told that he got many good opportunities to become a cricketer in school so now he is a millionaire. In conclusion, I disagree entirely that
music
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and
sports
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should be equally important as academic
subjects
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because artistic and physical education encourage their overall development and it
also
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helps to build their career.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • well-rounded education
  • holistic development
  • traditional academic courses
  • multiple intelligences
  • personal growth
  • professional athlete
  • music therapist
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • discipline
  • leadership
  • stress relief
  • mental health
  • cultural enrichment
  • global career
  • cognitive abilities
  • concentration
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