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Band 6

In some cultures elderly people are highly valued, while in some cultures youth are more valued . Discuss both views

#cultures #people #youth
Owing to the problem of which age group of
people
 are more valued by the society, some
people
 think elderly
people
 have a high value. In my opinion, I believe young
people
 have the same value as the elderly.
First
 and foremost, youths are the future and foundation of the country, they are like the blood in a man's body. To be more specific, the world needs the energy of the
youth
, the society cannot work smooth and efficient without the contribution of young
people
. All the elite companies around the world recruit lots of fresh graduates every year, which means they are benefited from the passion and creativity of young
people
. If they do not have the appropriate proportion of
youth
on
Change preposition
in
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 the right positions, the performance of the company certainly would be affected.
Therefore
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society could not underestimate the achievements of the improvement of the
youth
 for the cultures.
On the other hand
, elderly
people
 have the same importance as the
youth
, because their experience and wisdom are crucial, as the brain in a man's body. Take the case of the highest leader of most countries, they are all elderly
people
, which indicates the elderly
people
 have more advantages in making decisions or dealing with other
people
. If they do not go through the time of working with different tasks, it is hard to make the work
on
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apply
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balance.
As a result
, the world needs
the
Correct article usage
apply
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elderly
people
 to use their experience in order to give instruction to the
next
 generation. In conclusion, I believe the young and elderly
people
 both have advantages, which means they are both equally valued.
Submitted by so163uh on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reverence
  • wisdom
  • life experience
  • integrate
  • respected
  • innovation
  • progress
  • energy
  • investment
  • harness
  • potential
  • advancement
  • tradition
  • guidance
  • navigated
  • merits
  • tradition
  • adaptability
  • forward-thinking
  • contributions
  • intergenerational
  • respect
  • synergistic
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