Some people give more importance to artists ( painters, writers, musicians) in the current age of rapidly developing technology and science. What do you think? Do people prefer arts to technology in your view?

In our modern life, most
people
appreciate real art like writers, artists, painters, musicians, dancers, and theatre actors more than new technologies and science, whereas Gen Z
people
most prefer modern things. In
this
essay, I will discuss both points of view and give my own opinion on the matter.
Firstly
, adults mostly stick to traditions and they sometimes do not understand discoveries.
Secondly
, young
people
are accustomed to making life easier with
such
things as a laptop, headphones, robot vacuum cleaners, and other useful things.
To begin
with, humanity in our era gets used to the internet for everything and everywhere from work to simple viewing of interesting videos on YouTube and other social media. In fact, these amenities make life easier,
for instance
, if I need to cook something for dinner I can search the ideas and recipes on Google.
Also
, for the
last
4 years NFT began to develop these are tokens that a person can own only in his name.
In other words
, these are animated photos that are created and sold online. And it was invented due to the rapid development of technology
that is
supposed that in the future everything will be online even weddings.
On the other hand
, workmanship
estimated
Add a missing verb
is estimated
show examples
differently because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
art connoisseurs so loves it. Nowadays, we can find exhibitions and museums in large
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
it does not mean that there are no online museums.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
same way,
people
really
Submitted by ruslanabbosovich on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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