IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people 's lives . Others think that adult life brings more happiness , in spite of greater responsibilities . Discuss both these views and give your opinion .

#people #years #times #lives #adult #life #happiness #spite #responsibilities
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People
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 have
different
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a different
show examples
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opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
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 about
happiest
Correct article usage
the happiest
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 moment in their
life
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. While many
people
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 believe that they were happy when they are adolescence ,
while
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apply
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other believe that adulthood was more enjoyable than their teenage. In my
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opinion
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,opinion
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 the happiest moment of a person's
life
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 varies from time to time. In
this
Linking Words
essay
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,essay
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 we will discuss
the
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apply
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both views and give our
opinion
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.
To begin
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with
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,with
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 each stage of
life
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 has its own sorrows and joys. Many
people
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 remember their teenage years with utmost importance as they enjoyed their school or college days . As friendships are the prime during those years, many of us
has
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have
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 experienced joyful moments.
For Instance
Linking Words
, sports events, and college parties were great occasions to get together and have fun.
Also
Linking Words
 teenage have much fewer
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responsibilities
responsibilites
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responsibilities
 than adults.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, adulthood offers several positive and happy moments. Most
of
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apply
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the adults fondly remember their cherished moments
such
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getting
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as getting
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 their
first
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 job or house, marriage day celebration,
and
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apply
show examples
birth of
child
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a child
the child
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 and so on. As
the
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apply
show examples
people
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age
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,age
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 they develop qualities
such
Linking Words
maturity
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as maturity
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 and understanding. These factors can bring a sense of stability which contributes
long term
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long-term
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 happiness in many
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people
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people's
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 lives. In conclusion, teenage and
adulthood
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adult
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life
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 have their shares of up and down. While lack of
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
responsibility
responsibilites
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
 during
teenage
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the teenage
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make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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life
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 more joyous, while
realization
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the realization
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 of one's dream
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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 adult
life
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 more responsible. In my
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opinion
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,opinion
show examples
 it is up to each
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individual
indvidual
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individual
 to decide which period was the happiest in their
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by niaakash on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adolescence
  • fulfillment
  • responsibilities
  • exploration
  • long-term goals
  • sense of stability
  • carefree
  • contentment
  • well-being
  • life stage
  • unique opportunities
  • deep satisfaction
What to do next:
Look at other essays: