Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Healthy nutrition in today's Society is a huge topic. The amount of
sugar
in multiple manufactured food and
drink
products
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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an often discussed problem. It's scientifically proven that it can cause several health issues
such
as diabetes, high blood pressure or heart problems. Some people think that the price of sugary products should be raised so that customers are encouraged to eat and
drink
less
sugar
. I don't agree and believe that there are better ways to do so. An alternative way to eat or
drink
less
sugar
is using sweeteners. A good example of reducing the amount of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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sweet sin one consumes is drinking
sugar
-free soft drinks
instead
of the original variant. You can
also
use a variety of sweeteners at home
for instance
in your yoghurt or the morning coffee. A problem is that some people have intolerances to artificial sweeteners but these are less harmful than the diseases real
sugar
can cause. Raising the price for goods that contain high levels of
sugar
will not make people
consuming
Wrong verb form
consume
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it is less
cause
Correct your spelling
because
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even the most common food
such
as bread or pasta is made with it. If customers are used to
have
Change the verb form
having
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e.g
Correct your spelling
e.g.
a specific sweet
drink
they like it's very unlikely that they skip drinking it just because the price goes up. Family doctors should be involved by offering regular body checkups and information about the most common diseases caused by our way of life. In conclusion, I believe that every individual should decide what and how much to eat or
drink
on its own. The important thing to know is how to still maintain a well-balanced nourishment. It's better to raise awareness about alternative substitutes
as well as
more advertising and education about a healthier way to enjoy food or drinks.
Submitted by s.jeckel on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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