IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #people #crimes #community #service* #prison #sentence #crime
It is common that in most countries that the government has the law of not sentencing association to prison,
instead
 work in on community
service
 in the
neighbourhood
 for the community who committed a minor felony, and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 strongly suggest
this
 is the best move and I will support my statement in the paragraphs below in
this
 world crime has become a very common occurrence in all the cities in the world, varying in the severity of the crime from a very serious charge to a minor charge and it is ideal to have the community who commit small crimes be instructed to work in association
service
 will be really beneficial for the
convict
. As he
works
 in
neighbourhood
service
 in his
locality
 he gets to meet a
lot
 of
people
 and get an
opportunity
 to know the
nation
 living around the
neighbourhood
 and help him socialize with
people
,
this
 will greatly help the
convict
 to
blend
 in the
society
 as it helps him to transform into a better
person
 by working and helping other
people
 As he
works
 in
neighbourhood
service
 in his
locality
 he gets to meet a
lot
 of
people
 and get an
opportunity
 to know the
nation
 living around the
neighbourhood
 and help him socialize with
people
,
this
 will greatly help the
convict
 to
blend
 in the
society
 as it helps him to transform into a better
person
 by working and helping other
people
 As he
works
 in
neighbourhood
service
 in his
locality
 he gets to meet a
lot
 of
people
 and get an
opportunity
 to know the
nation
 living around the
neighbourhood
 and help him socialize with
people
,
this
 will greatly help the
convict
 to
blend
 in the
society
 as it helps him to transform into a better
person
 by working and helping other
people
 As he
works
 in
neighbourhood
service
 in his
locality
 he gets to meet a
lot
 of
people
 and get an
opportunity
 to know the
nation
 living around the
neighbourhood
 and help him socialize with
people
,
this
 will greatly help the
convict
 to
blend
 in the
society
 as it helps him to transform into a better
person
 by working and helping other
people
 As he
works
 in
neighbourhood
service
 in his
locality
 he gets to meet a
lot
 of
people
 and get an
opportunity
 to know the
nation
 living around the
neighbourhood
 and help him socialize with
people
,
this
 will greatly help the
convict
 to
blend
 in the
society
 as it helps him to transform into a better
person
 by working and helping other
people
Submitted by bladtherf on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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