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Band 5

It is much more convenient to watch a movie on television or computer than buy a ticket and go to the cinema. In the nearest future the popularity of cinemas will drastically decline. Do you agree or disagree?

#movie #television #computer #ticket #cinema #future #popularity #cinemas #decline
There are plenty of resources
allow
Correct pronoun usage
that allow
show examples
people
 to watch
Add an article
a movie
the movie
show examples
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
 without going to
Add an article
the theater
a theater
show examples
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays. In
this
 phenomenon, those cinemas may disappear
or
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
less than before in the future from our lives. As far as I am concerned,
although
 I agree
this
 problem will occur in our life recently,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
they're
show examples
 still have some advantages of
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 exist. Cinema can provide lots of
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
 when
people
 seating in the
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 and see a
movie
. Sometimes
people
 are enjoying the atmosphere of the
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 which
filled
Add a missing verb
is filled
show examples
 with full of audience. Not only
the
Add a missing verb
does the
show examples
 plot of the film influences
people
’s emotion but
also
 the
people
 who seat in the same place can give different affect.
For example
, laughing or screaming sounds from other audiences helped
people
 to have more fun during playing the movies. And some
people
 just like the high technological facilities of the
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 and the popcorn made from the front desk.
However
, with the rapid development of the applications and software, more and more resources from the website provide
people
different
Change preposition
with different
show examples
 ways to watch a
movie
instead
 of going to
Add an article
the theater
show examples
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
. A cost of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
membership
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a
movie
 website almost
equaling
Replace the word
equal
show examples
 to the ticket
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a
movie
 in the cinema.
People
 have more willingness to pay for the members of media platforms, the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 only because of the money but
also
change
Correct word choice
because change
show examples
 the habitat of
people
 how to watch a
movie
. Some
people
also
 think staying
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Add an article
the home
a home
show examples
 is safety
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 the outdoor due to
high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
 proportion of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
criminal. In conclusion,
movie
Add an article
a movie
show examples
theater
Fix the agreement mistake
theaters
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is a popular entertainment
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
 for everyone. But some reasons lead the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of cinemas
drop
Add the particle
to drop
show examples
 generally, it is obviously
happened
Wrong verb form
happening
show examples
 now and I think it will become more closed
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 in the future.
Submitted by patrick880613 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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