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Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays families are not as close as they used to be. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to make families closer?

#families
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Everyone comes from a family which is the closest person to
people
Use synonyms
’s life. But it
seems
Add the particle
toseems
show examples
 appear some changes in the distance between
families
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 recently. As far as I am concerned, there are some reasons for making
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon happen and the solution to
this
Linking Words
 problem would be easier for everyone to do. With the rapid development of technology,
people
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 spent more time on electronic devices than before. In the past, there were not any smartphones or tablets
appeared
Correct pronoun usage
that appeared
show examples
 on the dining table when the family was having a meal together. After those devices
comes
Change the verb form
come
show examples
 into human life,
people
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 used to have fun on the phone rather than talking with parents or
families
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. It totally contributes a huge effect on a family’s relationship. If
people
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 do not interact in person and making connections with each other will become hard work.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, chatting on social media with
families
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 would not obtain any emotion or feeling.
However
Linking Words
, getting close to family is not so hard for everyone with some fundamental methods.
Firstly
Linking Words
, hanging out with
families
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 in their free time
instead
Linking Words
 staying off and playing video games.
Although
Linking Words
 those electronic devices are quite interesting, it is hard to share with other
people
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.
Secondly
Linking Words
, making more connections between
families
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 by communicating will help a lot on known each other.
For example
Linking Words
, if
people
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 have more recognition a person
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will know deeply and can get closer easily. To sum up, more and more
families
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 have huge distance between each other. In my opinion, it was due to several reasons and it was easy to solve.
Submitted by patrick880613 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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