IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Now o lot of peopre in college ore doing ocodernic sludy. should encouroge lhem lo leorn vocotionol skill (like plumbers elecfricions). Do you ogree or disogree?

#peopre #college #ore #ocodernic #sludy #encouroge #lhem #leorn #vocotionol #skill #plumbers #elecfricions #ogree #disogree
The Line graph depicts the information about the population size, and
also
 compared the
birth
 and mortality
rate
 of England and Whale for a period of 300 years starting from 1700. Overall, it is evident that
Correct your spelling
the
teh
Correct your spelling
the
 population showed
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
and
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 upward trend, whereas
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
show examples
 and
death
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 showed a fluctuating trend. It is vivid that,
birth
 and
death
 rates followed a similar trend from 1700 to 1950. From 1700-1750, and
increase
Add an article
the increase
an increase
show examples
 was seen in both these, with the
birth
rate
 rising from 30 to 40 births per 1000 people and the
death
rate
 increasing from 27 to 37 births per 1000 people. There was stability in both for the
next
 50 years, after which a sharp fall
wilth
Correct your spelling
with
 both rates reaching an
all time
Add a hyphen
all-time
show examples
 low of around 20 thousand per people by 1950. In between, from 1850 to 1900,
birth
 and mortality
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 again showed a levelling off. From 1950 to 2000,
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
show examples
rate
 dramatically increased from 22 to 33 births per 1000. In
Correct your spelling
contrast
constrast
Correct your spelling
contrast
,
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
rate
 remained stable. The three centuries saw a dramatic escalation in population from 2.5
Correct your spelling
million
millition
Correct your spelling
million
 in 1700 to 49 million in 2000, with a short period of stability from 1750-1800.
Submitted by anjali.machireddy on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: