IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Mobile phones are considered essential by most people nowadays. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phones

#phones #people
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nowadays mobile
phones
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 are really a part of
humans
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day
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 to
day
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life
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.we have to accept that.there is
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
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 of mobile
phones
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 are manufacturing by branded companies like apple,
samsung
Change the capitalization
Samsung
show examples
 etc.each
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phones
Change to a singular noun
phone
show examples
 are different from the other one based on price,specifications,quality,brand and even colour and size,weight.so we can buy a mobile
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phone based
Add a hyphen
phone-based
show examples
 on our
requirments
Correct your spelling
requirements
. now we will see some advantages of
mobile
Correct article usage
the mobile
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phone
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.
recent
Change preposition
In recent
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days
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 mobile
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phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 are very useful for
Add an article
a teenager
the teenager
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teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
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 to adults.teenagers used mobile
phones
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 for
academic
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the academic
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purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
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 for most.
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 there is plenty of options are in it.we can download academic files through
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
.
eventually
Add a comma
,eventually
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 tutors
also
Linking Words
 used
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gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
 wisely for taking seminars,to take notes.
mobiles
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 are mostly used for communication worldwide.in
this
Linking Words
 fastest technological world
humans
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 need lots of communication.so they
using
Wrong verb form
use
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 mobile
phones
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.from wakeup
at
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in
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morning
Correct article usage
the morning
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 to till sleep at night
mobiles
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 are attached
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
humans
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.
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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 portable so we can easily take it wherever we go.
its
Correct your spelling
it's
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 very less weight to keep in our hands.easily
Correct your spelling
chargeable
chargeble
Correct your spelling
chargeable
.
very
Correct word choice
and very
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 affordable to buy. now we will see the drawbacks of
humans
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 because of mobile
phones
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.the usage of
mobiles
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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keeps on increasing
day
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 by
day
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.
accordingly
Linking Words
humans
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 are very lazy
because
Add the preposition
ofbecause
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 the usage of
mobiles
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.the wave of
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gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
 in
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humans
Change noun form
humans'
human's
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 routine
life
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 is on
peek
Correct article usage
the peek
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 now.on the other side we all
are keep
Change the verb form
keep
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 on being lazier these
days
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.
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
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 these
mobiles
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
affect the relationship between family,
friends
Correct word choice
and friends
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.because past
days
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 of human
life
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 much different from
Correct your spelling
today's
today
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
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 human
life
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.in older
days
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 all
are play
Change the verb form
play
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 together,work together,chatting together.but now all these things
done
Add the auxiliary verb
are done
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in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 mobile
phones
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itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
.
Linking Words
finally
Add a comma
,finally
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 from my point of view,
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gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
 are
most
Add an article
a most
the most
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 welcomed thing but we need to know how to bring
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 our own
life
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.we need to set some limits for
Use synonyms
gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
.we have to separate mobile
Use synonyms
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
 from our
life
Use synonyms
.
Use synonyms
gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
 are playing the most
Correct your spelling
important
iportant
Correct your spelling
important
 role in human
life
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,but it
nt
Correct your spelling
not
 to be like that.we can do
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
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 of
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 by
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
 without using
mobiles
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 and
Use synonyms
gadjets
Correct your spelling
gadgets
.
its
Correct your spelling
It's
show examples
 time to
wakup
Correct your spelling
wakeup
wake up
humans
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otherwise
Linking Words
 it will be a dangerous start for
humans
Use synonyms
 in the name of technology.
Submitted by thilaga.pt88 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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