Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit

It is believed by some locals that voluntary work can be an advantageous option for

teenagers

and

start

Wrong verb form

starting

show examples

serving their

community

could be an option. Personally speaking, I agree with the statement because in a

community

people have to work together if they want to live

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a high living standard. Working for their own

community

teenagers

could broaden their social skills and become aware of their role in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society. During that time, those people could get along with some senior locals and exchange experiences,

for example

. It is

also

the perfect way to start developing working skills when delivering the mail, walking pets for their

neighbors

Change the spelling

neighbours

show examples

/the elders,

cleaning

Correct word choice

and cleaning

show examples

pools, to start with. These are some services that an

unexperienced

Correct your spelling

inexperienced

show examples

teenager could get involved

Change preposition

in.

show examples

community

service,

teenagers

do not have to have previous experience and it is not a demanding job which

teenagers

could easily learn from and understand the value of working. If

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

from one side, one can number lots of benefits,

on the other

hand

Add the comma(s)

,hand

show examples

/side, some people can have

bias

Add an article

a bias

show examples

against those kinds of jobs because they give the false impression that those who are serving the

community

are required to do so because they might have done something wrong or harmful to others, since these kinds of services are currently being used as punishment. Working for a

community

should not be a punishment in any circumstances. In conclusion, we can see that motivating a teenager to do voluntary work is a

Correct your spelling

positive

posivite

Correct your spelling

positive

win-win attitude and, as

result

Correct article usage

a result

show examples

this

kind of job,

community

leaders could invest their

Correct your spelling

efforts

effords

Correct your spelling

effort

in other important needs

such

as providing better

heath

Correct your spelling

health

show examples

and education structure in a feedback wheel.

Submitted by fjm on Sat Jul 09 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

279 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

required
unpaid
community work
benefit
teenagers
life skills
volunteering
empathy
compassion
socially aware
responsible
interact
diverse backgrounds
cultural understanding
tolerance
work experience
essential skills
employment
interests
passions
career development
contribute
betterment
development
local community
mental well-being
stress
self-esteem
burden
academic
personal lives
time management
support
balance
participate
encouraged
numerous benefits
individuals
conclusion

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
WRITE A REFERRAL LETTER
I am writing to refer Alfred Billy who has been diagnosed with skin cancer. Now he is set to be discharged into your care.
9
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some ways. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Some advertising agencies have endeavoured to introduce their products’ unique features to the public in recent years. This essay will first suggest that brand differentiation and consumer appeal are the two foremost reasons, and I believe that this is a positive trend thanks to improved cash flow and the rise in consumer satisfaction.
4
band
Light pollution (excessive light during nighttime) is a form of pollution, especially in modern cities. What problems does light pollution cause, and what solutions can you suggest for governments and businesses to take?
Light pollution is a common problem amongst the big cities nowadays. It has a big effect on global warming, people’s daily life and other earth creatures in general which is harmful for our planet and needs to be dealt with.
8
band
Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on lerning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?
Many graduates around the world lack of skills to solve real-world problems. Throughout the education system, the primary focus is on learning facts rather than practical skills. This essay will argue why practical skills are highly inevitable.
4
band
In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Nowadays, in many countries young people are overconfident because many children eating fast food and energy drinking at school or street every day and also this condition increasing year by year. I think that the ourselves has the responsibility this issue.

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

WRITE A REFERRAL LETTER

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some ways. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Light pollution (excessive light during nighttime) is a form of pollution, especially in modern cities. What problems does light pollution cause, and what solutions can you suggest for governments and businesses to take?

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on lerning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree.