Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

While some people think that giving
children
a chance to make their own decisions on daily basis
things
(e.g. food, clothes and entertainment) could end up with self-absorbed people, others believe that it is wise to let
children
choose
things
that have
impacts
Fix the agreement mistake
impact
show examples
on their lives. From my point of view, making decisions on their own would be better and
reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
show examples
will be clarified for both views in
this
essay. Seemingly, a virtue of deciding matters on their own might be that the risk of getting strayed from the right path is reduced.
This
means that if
children
are allowed to do
all
Correct pronoun usage
it all
show examples
by themselves, they are likely to witness which
things
can affect negatively and which
things
can
result
in positive effects.
For instance
, if their diet only contains meat, their immune system will be at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
low level so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
illness can frequently happen to them. In order to prevent
this
,
children
may add vegetables to their meals in the future after suffering once. The
result
is that they become to know the importance and start to follow the right path.
On the other hand
, the unwanted
result
that can get from
this
manner is that it will ruin
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
life if the ability to control themselves is
lacked
Wrong verb form
lacking
show examples
. As an example, every child knows that eating many sweets may cause toothache. Despite having
this
knowledge, they cannot get ahold of themselves and let their appetite win eventually.
As a
result
, not only the child itself but
also
its
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
can be in trouble in the long run. All in all, it is utterly contingent upon
children
's mindsets. If they do not have self-control, nightmares can be on the way. If it is not,
then
their future can be bright. In my opinion, I strongly believe that
instead
of being strict
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
children
, teaching them to be masters of their minds and letting them make their own decisions might create
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
colourful world full of sensible adults.
Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Autonomy
  • Consequence-awareness
  • Self-centered
  • Informal decision-making education
  • Child development
  • Age-appropriate choices
  • Cognitive growth
  • Fostering independence
  • Parental guidance
  • Societal norms
  • Interpersonal consideration
  • Balance of freedom
  • Individualism versus collectivism
  • Experience-based learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: