It is suggested that all the young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in their community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people?

Nowadays, young
people
should be encouraged to volunteer more as volunteerism helps them acquire crucial social skills. More importantly, strong and young
volunteers
represent a vital resource for
needed
Replace the word
needy
show examples
people
.
However
, it is debated whether the
above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
show examples
advantages outweigh some common disadvantages. Personally, I feel that a period of youth voluntary work is convenient not only for
youngsters
but
also
for the
community
. One of the main benefits that volunteering brings to young
people
is to increase opportunities
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
employment because they learn some social skills needed in the workplace. First of all,
volunteers
develop empathy for others and learn to talk far more effectively to other
people
.
This
will enable them to develop more communication skills.
Secondly
,
volunteers
devote a lot of
time
to doing things in groups.
As a result
, they are far more likely to be good at working in teams than
people
without volunteer experience. A good example is the fact that many employers highly seek volunteering experience in work applications. Meanwhile, the
community
benefits from strong
volunteers
as there are always heavy tasks to accomplish. There is no doubt that old
volunteers
do not possess as much physical strength as young adults do.
This
means that young
volunteers
may be resources for specific duties in the
community
.
For instance
,
youngsters
could be allocated to clean the streets of cities. Yet some
people
believe that volunteering is disadvantageous for young
people
because it is a waste of
time
.
For example
, critics argue that if
youngsters
who have completed high school devoted their
time
to volunteering, they would stop studying for a period.
By
Change preposition
On
show examples
contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
show examples
, they would be supposed to go to university or college and gain more knowledge.
Furthermore
, other
people
are of the opinion that
youngsters
are often inexpert
volunteers
,
while
in the
community
there are problematic
people
such
as orphans and fragile ill
people
.
This
means that the
community
could not have
volunteers
able to deal with these
people
because young
volunteers
do not have enough experience in it.
However
, in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
volunteering would allow young
people
to be more connected with the real world than they would be by attending academic courses, and,
also
, they could learn fast to handle delicate situations with
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
initial tutoring by experienced
volunteers
. In conclusion, despite the fact that youth volunteering brings some downsides both to young
people
such
as stopping for a
while
their career paths and the
community
which may have a lack of experienced
volunteers
, I’m convinced that a period of voluntary work is an investment of
time
for young
people
and an indispensable resource for the
community
.
Submitted by claudiareddavid on

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task response
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and provides relevant arguments. Ensure to address all aspects of the prompt and use specific examples to strengthen your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion. To further improve coherence, aim to use transition words and cohesive devices to link your ideas more effectively.

Word Count

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Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • skill development
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • communication
  • leadership
  • social responsibility
  • community engagement
  • empathy
  • civic duty
  • networking opportunities
  • volunteering
  • personal growth
  • confidence
  • financial compensation
  • economic drawbacks
  • exploitation
  • free labor
  • fair exchange
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