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Band 4.5

In modern society, more and more people live longer. Do you think the benefits of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#society #people #situation
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Human’s
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Human
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 life expectancy has been on the rise in recent decades. Personally, I believe that despite the good intentions behind increasing the time people exist, it will be disadvantageous in the long run.
On the other hand
, there is still no denying that high longevity has its own merits.
Firstly
, when humans have the ability to live longer, their knowledge and experiences will increase in
such
 an incredible way. Meanwhile, our world can reach a new peak point
of
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in
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 technology and expand our awareness
about
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of
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 the universe.
Secondly
, these days, many parents don’t have enough time to look after their children carefully. When these children’s grandparents can raise their longevity, children can be nurtured by them.
Nevertheless
, critics are quick to point out that a longer lifetime will threaten our world with its drawbacks. Take Japan
for
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,for
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 example, having the highest percentage of old citizens and expected to go up rapidly in the future, Japan is facing a serious issue -
Correct article usage
the labor
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labor
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labour
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 problem.
This
 trouble can easily affect the national economy and social life. Countries with an
aging
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ageing
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 population usually have a high proportion of foreign workers, which costs those regions a lot. Elderly inhabitants, who spend their
last
 time in nursing homes, often don’t get full services due to the lack of nurses.
Moreover
, we can’t forget the great burden placed on public services, especially
countries
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in countries
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 with free civil services. Hospitals, transports,
equipment
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and equipment
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 will not be able to tackle
such
 a giant number of dwellers.
Last
 but not least, the lack of natural resources is
also
 a problem that can’t be neglected. There is a common belief that our fossil fuel and nonrenewable resources will hit the bottom soon if the death rate in the world is lower than the birth rate. As has been discussed above, the negative points associated with high longevity outweigh its merits.
Submitted by nguyenthuytien1609 on

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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