The only way to reduce drug abuse is to legalise the substance and bring them under control. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and induce any relevant examples from your own knownledge or experience.

#drug #abuse #legalise #substance #control #knownledge

There is no denying the fact that

drug

abuse

is an extremely serious problem. It leads to a large number of

society

Replace the word

social

show examples

and criminal issues. Some

people

believe that if the

substance

is taken under

control

and under laws, the facets of

drug

abuse

will

also

decrease.

However

, I cannot totally agree with

this

view. I am concerned that legalizing the

substance

would cause other

problems

. Understandably, governments look for ways to reduce

drug

abuse

and one way is to legalize and

control

the

substance

. Following

this

, the governments would know the origin of drugs and

also

uncover the prevalent use of drugs

in particular

areas.

Hence

, they would

control

problems

in the right direction. A good example of

this

is The legalization of cannabis in

Netherlands

Correct article usage

the Netherlands

show examples

, which has successfully reduced criminalization.

However

, the legalization of the

substance

leads to many

problems

such

as addiction. To be more precise, when the

substance

is not against the law, It is easy to possess. If

people

use it more than usual, they will become addicted and get

drug

overdose

Wrong verb form

overdosed

show examples

For example

, in the case of cannabis, since it is legal in Thailand, the latest news reports that many

people

died from

cannabis

Add an article

a cannabis

show examples

overdose.

Moreover

, if the

substance

is brought from a general shop, someone will constantly purchase it to persuade other

people

. Indeed,

people

can buy the

drug

from the grocery store

although

there is a limited amount of

drug

Fix the agreement mistake

drugs

show examples

or age of

Add an article

the customer

show examples

customer

Fix the agreement mistake

customers

show examples

, it is not impossible to

control

the whole amount of drugs

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

they possess. And they will use these to induce other

people

to be criminals. In conclusion, there are many ways to reduce

substance

abuse

. One of these is to take it to legal and

control

it. It could be argued that

legalization

Correct article usage

the legalization

show examples

of substances not only causes health

problems

, it

also

causes more criminals.

Therefore

we should find other ways to solve

this

problem.

Submitted by tipdaa on Thu Jul 14 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

318 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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