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Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #university #college #route #career #job #school
Many
people
 generally believe that individuals should seek
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
job
 immediately after graduation.
While
 there are some merits to support that idea, I would argue that pursuing
further
 education is the best way to become successful. On the one hand, the option to get a
job
 has
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
certain benefits.
To begin
 with,
people
 are more likely to be financially independent since they could earn the money soon and help their family cover some expenses to reduce the family's financial burden. On top of that, they
also
 have chances to gain more real-world experience sooner than other their peers and they would bring it into practice with the aim of getting a competitive salary in the future.
Moreover
, with dense experiences and
a great deal of
Change the quantifier
a lot of
many
plenty of
show examples
 practical skills, they have a tendency to get married soon and take care of their family very well.
On the other hand
, there are numerous reasons why I believe continuing to study tertiary education would be the
most
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
right choice. The first rationale is that there are some work positions that require relevant qualifications. These could range from dentists and doctors to lecturers that
people
 lending a
job
 straight away could
not
Rewrite the sentence
apply
show examples
couldn't
Remove a modal verb
apply
show examples
do it. By way of illustration, my uncle took his whole life to learn to become a distinguished doctor, 7 years to get a
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
show examples
 degree, and a host of following years to get
Master
Change noun form
Master's
show examples
 and PhD qualifications in America.
Therefore
, there is no way for ordinary
people
 who do not don't study university
tocan
Correct your spelling
to
 become a doctor or some jobs requiring a degree.
Besides
 that, those who study other
majorsmajor
Correct your spelling
majors major
major major
 could learn
a great deal of
Change the quantifier
a lot of
many
plenty of
show examples
 academic subjects and necessary soft skills
as well as
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are able to have some great relationships and memorable times at the university which contribute to their mental development and essential skills in order to get a lucrative
job
 after graduation. In conclusion,
while
 some maintain that individuals should find a
job
 right after graduation, I strongly believe that it is better to pursue higher education to succeed.
Submitted by luudang97 on

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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
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