Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development

During ancient times,

people

used to treat themselves by creating their own medicines. Nowadays because of technological developments,

people

go to

hospitals

However

, some do not go to

hospitals

because they do not want to get in touch with

people

This

is not

also

a great idea as the doctors have better

knowledges

Change the wording

knowledge

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

in medicinal fields.

Firstly

, traditional medicine is made from herbs without mixing chemicals and they used to prefer

this

method. Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

knew how to treat themselves without seeing doctors when there was no hospital like today.

In addition

, because of advanced technologies, they learn everything from internet platforms like google,

facebook

Change the capitalization

Facebook

show examples

and youtube.

However

, one should not believe in that sources absolutely.

On the other hand

, the public nowadays thinks that medicine was actually mixed with chemicals which will affect them later.

Besides

, the medicines are really expensive as it is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

difficulty

Replace the word

difficult

show examples

for them to buy from pharmacies and

also

some patients are allergic to medicines.

However

, we have to think before getting late.So even if some are allergic to drugs, a doctor will definitely change that drug and treat it. To conclude, it is better if patients visit

hospitals

and consult doctors

instead

of trying their own treatment.

Moreover

, promoters should motivate the community to come to

hospitals

and do health facilities appropriately and exactly.

Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on Sat Jul 16 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

221 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include : &Where you stayed. & What the problems were. & How they can fix your complaints.
I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with my recent stay at the Burj Al Arab Hotel during a conference organized by my company from July 10 to July 12, 2024. Unfortunately, my experience was marred by several issues in my room that I feel need to be addressed.
6.5
band
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
In a recent time, people with health issues have become the primary concern of the healthcare system. However, individuals with medical conditions seek alternative medications and treatment methods rather than consulting a physician, and this is an alarming situation. In this essay, I will explain the negative effects of this approach with supportive reasons.
5
band
Unemployment remains the biggest challenge to school leavers in most countries. How far do you agree with this assessment?
It is an undeniable fact that unemployment remains one of the global challenges faced by today’s generation. Owing to the economic crisis, in many countries, people are suffering from joblessness. I completely agree with this, which I would like to explain further in the upcoming paragraphs.
8
band
You have received a letter from your bank, asking you to acknowledge receipt of a new bank card. However, the card was missing from the envelope. Write a letter to the bank's head office. In your letter: ● explain why you are writing ● express concern about the missing card ● ask them what they intend to do
I am writing this letter to inform you that a new debit card was missing from the envelope sent by the bank and I am concerned about it.
4.5
band
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Today there are many people whose health is not very good and whose situation is worse day to day. Due to this, they visit their doctors, although someone wants to treat themselves with other treatments and medicines. In my opinion, it has more negative sides compared with positive ones.

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include : &Where you stayed. & What the problems were. & How they can fix your complaints.

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Unemployment remains the biggest challenge to school leavers in most countries. How far do you agree with this assessment?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?