IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some governments spend a lot of money on exploring space. Some feel that this investment is justified while others think that money should be spent on public services like health care and education. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

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It is crystal clear that
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction that. Consider removing the comma.

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government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 is spending a lot of
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 on exploring
space
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Some people think
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma between the verb and object in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 exploration is important while others argue that,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 should be spent on public services. I completely opine that it is better to explore other planets.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay will state some valid evidence for the same. To embark, to advance a convincing theory I could deal with the advantage of travelling to other planets for research.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
explorer
Fix the agreement mistake
explorers

It seems that explorer may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 could find another planet which is suitable for humans to live on. Due to the growing population of the world and its effect on the
earth
Add a comma
,earth

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Due to the growing population of the world and its effect on the earth. Consider adding a comma.

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 the need for another place to live
on
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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has inclined.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 to what I have just said, we can find out about new things in the
space
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it was written in a magazine that, a new chemical was found on Mars that can help to prevent cancer. In the forthcoming; paragraph I could deal
about
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 spending
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 on public services.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 travelling to
space
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is really important,
government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 should spend
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
for
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 other things like building new hospitals and schools. Having healthy people that have good knowledge in their field is very important for a country. If we want to progress, we need healthy human beings.
Additionally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, people have the right to have good facilities on the grounds that they are paying taxes.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in case to
know
Add the particle
toknow

It appears that the verb invent should be in the to-infinitive form. Consider adding the word to.

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 invent new technologies
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is needed. To conclude, gone is the idea that travelling to
space
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
Correct your spelling
is

The word in doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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in
Correct your spelling
is

The word in doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 not needed. We all know human activities lead to harm
the
Change preposition
to the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 Earth so we need to find
other planet
Change the wording
another planet
other planets

The adjective other appears to be modifying the singular noun planet. Consider making a change.

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 to survive.

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