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Band 4.5

Crime appears to be rising in the most countries in the world especially among the young people. Identify this possible cases of this trend and propose some solutions you think would be effective.

#crime #countries #world #people #cases #trend
Nowadays,
increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
show examples
 number of
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
 is
major
Add an article
a major
the major
show examples
 issue of
Correct your spelling
globally
global
globaly
Correct your spelling
globally
.
Although
, regimes claim that they are working to handle it , but yet
crime
 rates are still inclining. In
Correct your spelling
the
th
Correct your spelling
the
 upcoming
paragraphs
Add a comma
,paragraphs
show examples
 I will enlighten on the major causes of
this
 scenario, along with the possible and
implimentable
Correct your spelling
implementable
 cautions. To commence, with the major cause of the trend which is
indused
Correct your spelling
induced
infused
 mostly
adolescent
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
show examples
 to commit
crime
Add an article
a crime
the crime
show examples
,
that is
 uneducation. To elaborate,
education
 is the most vital accept of human life, with
education
 comes knowledge and experience.
However
, an article published recently
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
indicated the reasons behind the increasing
crime
 rates, the article reviles lack of
education
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 the major cause of
crime
, mostly committed by younger ones.
Therefore
, experts of
crime
Correct article usage
the crime
show examples
 department suggested to the Government of India, in crazy numbers of basic educational
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
 that can help to tackle the minor crimes which are done by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters.
The another
Remove the article
Another
show examples
 cause of
this phenomena
Change the determiner
this phenomenon
these phenomena
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
violence leading
Add a hyphen
violence-leading
show examples
content
. As
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
many web series and movies are released
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
picture
Fix the agreement mistake
pictures
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influencing
Wrong verb form
influence
show examples
 people
towards
Change preposition
toward
show examples
 wrongdoings. As a survey illustrated in India many young and adults are influenced by the
criminal related
Add a hyphen
criminal-related
show examples
content
.
Therefore
 sensor Board of India implemented
strict
Add an article
a strict
the strict
show examples
 ban on
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of
content
 and
this
 was the tackle really helpful to reduce
crime
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
greater
Correct article usage
a greater
show examples
 extent as well. To some up the increasing
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 lead to the uneducation.
Therefore
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should focus on
basic
Correct article usage
the basic
show examples
education
 of adolescents, as well as
imposed
Wrong verb form
impose
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
law against
violent related
Add a hyphen
violent-related
show examples
content
.
Submitted by manpreetsinghdhiman212 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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