IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Foreign visitor should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#visitor #visitors #attractions
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Some people argue that international tourists are supposed to pay more than native travellers for visiting historical monuments.I partially agree with
this
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 view,as now will be discussed. It is
first
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 necessary to acknowledge that there are,indeed,native
residences
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residents
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have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
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 to pay a
Correct your spelling
worthwhile
worthwile
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worthwhile
 expense to preserve national attractions through the tax system.
Therefore
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,it is reasonable that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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foreigners should pay a higher amount of fee than locals.
In addition
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,the more developed
the
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apply
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tourism is the more devastated the historical constructions are.
As a result
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,the local administration
need
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needs
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 to collect the
diffirence
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difference
cost
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 from aboard visitors to conserve and renovate the facilities of
tourist’s
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tourist
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 attractions.
For instance
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,the
singapore
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Singapore
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Correct your spelling
government
goverment
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government
 applied the lower
cost
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 for
domestic
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the domestic
a domestic
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 population for entrance
ticket
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tickets
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in
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to
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 every
destinations
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destination
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.
On the other hand
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, foreigners
already
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are already
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 prepared for their trip
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budget
buget
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budget
such
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 as the
cost
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 of travel, accommodation, food and buying souvenirs.
Thus
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, exceeding the
cost
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 might dissuade them from travelling.
This
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 cause a noticeable decrease in tourism and a significant source of income which impacts badly
to
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on
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 the
country
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country's
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 economy. One
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explanation
explaination
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explanation
 for
this
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 is that
,
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apply
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less
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fewer
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 tourists will make
a
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apply
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numerous hotels and restaurants to be closed
then
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 the unemployment rate rise dramatically.
For example
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, foreigners complained that the travelling charge in Vietnam
Add a missing verb
was way
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way
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was
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 much more than
other
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in other
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southern
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south
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asian
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Asian
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 countries like Thailand,
Cambodia
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and Cambodia
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 so they decided to travel
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to others
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Correct quantifier usage
other
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others
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other
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 countries in the area
instead
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so
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apply
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Vietnam lost
a
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apply
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large profitability in
this
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 field in 2016. In conclusion, it would be judicious to make the oversea tourists pay more than natives but it could be an
ineffiency
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inefficiency
 step for the
country
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country's
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 benefit if it is inconsequential
controlled
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and controlled
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 by the authorities.
Submitted by jordannguyen243 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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