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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

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Nowadays, the majority of children in
school
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 feel it hard to focus on their classes at
school
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 and there are many roots for
this
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 problem. In
this
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 essay, I will give some crucial reasons why it is hard to attend their teacher’s lectures and find suitable solutions for
this
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.
Firstly
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, research has shown that every student at
school
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 now has a private cell phone. The main problem is that when pupils feel
boring
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bored
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, they tend to use their mobile phone in class in order to divertissement and once the activity starts, they are not only distracted from the lessons but
also
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 hard to return to the original concentration state. So, the
school
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 board should bring in some regulations prohibiting
using
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the use of
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 electronic devices in the classroom. The second reason cause
this
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 question is at
the
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apply
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present there is more theoretical content than practical classes,
therefore
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, the students feel that the curriculum is monotonic and get bored easily.
That is
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 why the teacher
now
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apply
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should innovate the materials and the teaching methods. They should interact with the scholar rather than read
them
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the definition in the textbook.
Furthermore
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, more games or quizzes should be added to the lessons so that increase the pupil’s curiosity which can make them pay more attention to the lecture. In conclusion, a great number of students are losing concentration
while
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 studying in
school
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. In my opinion, distraction happens when the pupils find the syllabus uninteresting. To avoid that the teacher has to get attention and inspire students in their studies.

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task response
The essay demonstrates a general understanding of the topic but lacks specific and clear examples to support the main points. The response to the prompt is somewhat incomplete and lacks depth in addressing the reasons for students' difficulty in focusing and proposing effective solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay exhibits a logical structure, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the essay lacks coherence and cohesion due to insufficient development of ideas and a lack of clear connections between the reasons and solutions presented.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • distractions
  • focus
  • pay attention
  • lack of interest
  • motivation
  • fatigue
  • sleep
  • classroom environment
  • teaching methods
  • technology addiction
  • social media
  • peer pressure
  • workload
  • support
  • active learning strategies
  • engaging
  • student-centered teaching
  • realistic goals
  • rewards
  • balanced lifestyle
  • screen time
  • breaks
  • physical activity
  • support and guidance
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