Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
sophisticated technology, the
internet
Use synonyms
plays a crucial role in everyone’s lives. Some argue that there are massive advantages of the
internet
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
others say that it has numerous issues.
This
Linking Words
essay agrees with the latter view, and the reasons behind
this
Linking Words
will be explained in the subsequent paragraphs. The primary reason why it gives rise to plenty of problems is that it makes us lazy.
This
Linking Words
is because a person tends to spend
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most of their
time
Use synonyms
on the social media networks
such
Linking Words
as Facebook, Instagram and TikTok, so they do not have
time
Use synonyms
to engage in physical activities.
As a result
Linking Words
, sitting in front of the screen for a long
time
Use synonyms
leads to obesity-related diseases
such
Linking Words
as diabetes and cholesterol
For example
Linking Words
, a survey in Canada found that a vast majority of people who access the
internet
Use synonyms
for a long
time
Use synonyms
are more likely to suffer by obesity than others who do not. The other reason why it has many problems is that it usually makes
children
Use synonyms
more aggressive.
This
Linking Words
is to say that there is some violent content in video games, so when a child plays
such
Linking Words
types of games, they imitate the violence,
Linking Words
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
a result, they show more aggressiveness.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
usually compete with each other to win a game and if they do not win, they come into a depression so they start thinking about committing suicide.
For instance
Linking Words
, PUBG is banned in India because many
children
Use synonyms
committed suicide
while
Linking Words
playing
this
Linking Words
game over the past few years. In conclusion,
Although
Linking Words
there are many benefits of the
internet
Use synonyms
, I believe that it leads to a sedentary lifestyle and
children
Use synonyms
usually become violent.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The essay generally presents a clear argument and provides relevant supporting points, but the examples could be more specific and well-elaborated. More detailed explanations would enhance the task response and coherence.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat clear, but there are areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be more effectively linked to the main body of the essay. Cohesive devices and transitions could be used more consistently to improve coherence.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Consumer behavior
  • Virtual marketplace
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital footprint
  • Return policy
  • Comparison shopping
  • Customer reviews
  • Retail therapy
  • Logistics
  • User interface
  • Payment gateway
What to do next:
Look at other essays: