Some people think scientific research should focus on solving world health problems. Others think that there are more important issues. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

While
some adopt the view that scientists ought to put more emphasis on handling global health conundrums, others believe that there is room for more significant issues. I will discuss both views of the essay before my point is drawn
at the end
. On one hand, it is generally believed that worldwide strength had better be taken priority because of global growth.
Initially
, human beings will be the key factor behind
this
. Only when their energy is improved, are people able to lengthen their longevity, contributing more to society and facilitating other development.
For example
, paying so much attention to vaccines against Covid 19 is far superior during a pandemic. Without vaccines, individuals would have suffered from ailments and even increasing death tolls, leading to the decline of the economy over the world.
Additionally
, the appearance of new diseases these days
such
as monkeypox or various virant of Covid 19 virus has urged
Correct article usage
the
show examples
carry out more experiments.
On the other hand
,
however
, others think that environment and climate change are more pivotal.
Firstly
, the polluted environment has been alarming.
This
would enable citizens to suffer from the spreading of viruses or severe pollutants, which would harm human
well beings
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
.
Therefore
, research on
this
issue should be taken into consideration.
Besides
higher temperature is another factor. That would cause some negative impacts on the environment, sabotaging the habitats of animals and freshwater sources. If the government have merely prioritized fitness issues, surrounding climate change will suffer, resulting in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
downsides relating to fitness. In conclusion, there is a widely held view among people that conditions should top the list of consideration
whereas
others deem that there are still more alarming topics. I strongly believe that all issues are worth equally
considerating
Verb problem
considering
show examples
due to
their reciprocal influences.
Submitted by bonbon16319 on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat disorganized. The introduction and conclusion need improvement to better frame the essay. Some examples provided lack relevance to the main points. More specific and relevant examples are needed to support the arguments.
task achievement
The essay partially addresses the task prompt, but often lacks clarity and coherence in presenting ideas. The arguments could be more clearly developed to address the views and the writer's opinion in a more comprehensive way. It is important to ensure that the examples provided directly support the arguments and are relevant to the main points.

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