IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

For all children, the ability to play a musical instrument is just as important as the ability to read and write”. How far do you agree with this suggestion? How important is it for a child to learn to play a musical instrument, in your view

#children #ability #instrument #write” #suggestion #child
As reading and writing are important in a child's development,
music
also
 offers many benefits at a young age. Teaching our kids to play any musical instrument will help them to develop different useful
skills
 for life. In
this
 essay, I will give two reasons why children should interact with
music
 when they are younger.
First
 of all, playing any musical instrument helps to develop kinesthetic
skills
. Many studies affirm that having the ability to play any musical instrument keeps our brain strong in shape, and helps to avoid getting any disease
such
 as
Parkinsons
Change to a genitive case
Parkinson's
show examples
 or Alzheimers.
Moreover
,
music
 amps up children’s life expectancy.
On the other hand
, kids not only develop discipline and patience through
music
 but
also
 improve their listening and attention.
For instance
, with these
skills
, it would be easier, later on, to take on any new hobby and practice it properly. In conclusion, immersing our kids in
music
 when they are younger has tons of benefits
such
 as developing essential
skills
 to put up with the challenges in life and be part of a better society.
Submitted by Andrea Barreto on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: