Counties are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In
this
industralization
Correct your spelling
industrialization
industrialisation
age of 4.0,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
as
Correct your spelling
has
show examples
a significant influence on
people
daily life starting from daily
routine
Fix the agreement mistake
routines
show examples
to important things. The same as shopping, as we can buy anything
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
anywhere conveniently and the product can be shipped to us in a short period.
However
, I am
convienced
Correct your spelling
convinced
that there are both benefits and drawbacks on
this
as the
products
we are using are getting more and more similar.
Firstly
, because of the
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
development, we are able to use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good quality
products
from foreign countries, which upgrade our living standards.
For example
, we can see most of the Thai and Chinese
products
such
as food and beverage and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
clothing widely used in Myanmar as the quality are good and the price is reasonable. Yet, there are some similar
products
that are manufactured in Myanmar,
however
, we are getting used to the
import
Change the verb form
imported
show examples
product we
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
that the quality of the
products
are not the same even though the brand
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
the same.
This
has changed the mindset of the
people
not to promote the local
products
instead
Correct word choice
but instead
show examples
depending so much on the import and foreign brand new
products
. Meanwhile, have we not obviously seen enough that globalization has caused some minority
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
show examples
disappear
Add the particle
to disappear
show examples
and the young
people
are not keen to preserve their own
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
show examples
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
For example
,
traditional
Add an article
the traditional
show examples
costume
Fix the agreement mistake
costumes
show examples
of
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
ethnicity can rarely be seen as
people
just wear
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern clothes and never wear their own attire even on a special
occasion
Fix the agreement mistake
occasions
show examples
. To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that being able to
accessible
Replace the word
access
show examples
to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global
products
has made our lives getting better,
however
, should we just
forgotten
Wrong verb form
forget
show examples
our background and not
promoting
Wrong verb form
promote
show examples
our local
products
?
Submitted by nannphongnoan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Uniformity
  • Cultural exchange
  • Accessibility
  • Economic implications
  • Local economies
  • Sustainability
  • Environmental considerations
  • Consumer choice
  • Quality of life
  • Overconsumption
  • Artisanal goods
  • Global community
  • Trade and commerce
  • Eroding local businesses
What to do next:
Look at other essays: