Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #people

While most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

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museums

collect money from

people

for entry, others become free of charge. In

this

essay, both the merits and vulnerable points of collecting admission

fee

Fix the agreement mistake

fees

show examples

will be discussed while adding my own opinions.

First

of all, charging

people

for the pass to

museums

can have a significant positive impact on

country’s

Correct article usage

the country’s

show examples

budget.

For instance

, in many developing countries, tourism is the major sector which gives regular income

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apply

show examples

most of the time. Setting a price for admission, those nations will be able to not only upgrade the preservation system of

museums

but

also

fulfill

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fulfil

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other needs in different fields. Seemingly, another benefit that can be garnered from

this

manner is that only high-standard

people

with dignity can visit those buildings.

This

means that there will not be any inappropriate

behavior

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behaviour

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since lower-standard

people

who can trigger various problems will not get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

access to

museums

For instance

, if there is no charge,

people

from all walks of life can freely enter in and out so that there is likely to be undesirable damage to historical antiques.

On the other hand

, admission

fee

Fix the agreement mistake

fees

show examples

can act like a hindrance to those who are really intrigued

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show examples

exquisite historical things.

For instance

, if history enthusiasts let the chance for a visit to

museums

go due to financial issues, the result will be that the world may lose potential professionals in the fields of arts and history. In conclusion,

although

these are my mere opinions, I personally believe that charging

people

for the pass to

museums

can be better and can give more merits than not doing so.

However

, the price must be fair and reasonable so that everyone will have the same opportunity and discrimination will become a thing of the past.

Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on Sat Jul 30 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Admission fee
Revenue stream
Maintenance
Overcrowding
Commercialization
Cultural heritage
Diverse attendance
Community ownership
Access to culture
Visitor experience
Exhibit quality
Cultural mission
Reliance on funding
Government subsidies
Cultural accessibility

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Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbors and the sense of community is lost. Discuss the causes and give measures to turn it around.

The process diagram details the steps by which liquid chocolcate is produced from cocoa beans.

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development?