Some children spend hours everyday on smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Children are the future of the nation, and technology is a tool that can cater
in
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for
show examples
the
development
of a country. In the edge-cutting era, mobiles have become a necessity
instead
of
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luxury
Correct article usage
a luxary
show examples
luxary
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luxury
for many.
However
,
this
has brought a detrimental effect on the young generation who spend ample
of
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apply
show examples
time with it squandering their time. Clearly, both the pros and cons are prominently visible
of
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in
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this
gadget.
Use
Correct article usage
The use
show examples
of technology from a young age has prepared the children for a competitive future and
encourage
Wrong verb form
encouraged
show examples
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
set high goals. In the current, era parents often expose their children
with
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to
show examples
phones from an early to compensate for the time that they are unable to give them due to their busy life.
Nevertheless
, the fact that it has significant side effects can not be overlooked.
Initially
,
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
Correct your spelling
generation
genration
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generation
enjoyed playing outdoor games which helped in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
physical and mental
development
. The health of
young
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the young
show examples
generation has become a
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concern
consern
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concern
many
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in many
show examples
countries. For
insted
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instead
instant
, if a child spends most of his day playing games it hinders
the
Correct article usage
apply
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physical and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
development
, which even leads to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
patience
Change preposition
of patience
show examples
and
equinimity
Correct your spelling
equanimity
. So,
prolong
Wrong verb form
prolonged
show examples
exposure
of
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to
show examples
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
show examples
is
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likely
likly
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likely
to
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create
show examples
creat
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create
show examples
problems with the
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overall
show examples
over all
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overall
show examples
development
of an individual.
Smartphone
Add an article
The smartphone
A smartphone
show examples
is an endless world, that has no boundaries in terms of knowledge, which
is
Change the verb form
also comes
show examples
also
comes with demerits. Teenagers are generally unsupervised when
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
using mobiles,
early
Correct word choice
and early
show examples
Correct your spelling
exposure
exposoure
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exposure
of
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to
show examples
many adult
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stuff
stuf
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stuff
is likely to have a hazardous effect on the young brains.
For example
, recent years have
wittnessed
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witnessed
the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
straggering
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staggering
result, when a game called blue whales was trending due which lives were
also
lost. In the
Correct your spelling
beginning
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
, people played for fun but when the tasks became immoral they had already lost
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
control,
thus
leading to awful situations.
Therefore
, early prolonged hours
use
Change preposition
of use
show examples
of mobiles when the brain is not fully developed to distinguish
Correct your spelling
correct
corret
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correct
and wrong is likely to cause problems in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. To recapitulate, smartphones can provide
head
Correct article usage
a head
show examples
start and working parents can keep offsprings busy but the negative effects
is
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are
show examples
far more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
the positivities as it is harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
healty
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healthy
health
growth of the future generation
along side
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alongside
show examples
the lack of boundary the knowledge
avaliable
Correct your spelling
available
has caused disasters in
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
to continue.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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