Some believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#believe #money #education #computers #teachers

Many feel that funding allocated for education should be primarily spent on

computers

rather than paying the teaching staff higher salaries. In my opinion, though

technology

Add an article

the technology

show examples

is important today,

teachers

are still considerably more valuable and deserving of prioritization. Proponents argue

increased

Correct word choice

that increased

show examples

funding for computer technology reflects shifts in modern society. Expertise with

computers

is becoming essential not only for one’s daily life but

also

most

Change preposition

for most

show examples

careers. At the moment, schools focus on a wide range of subjects that may not have any direct applicability later in a student’s life

such

as history, biology, physics, literature, art, and so on. It is logical that focusing more on a useful area

such

as new

computers

will maximize funding for schools.

However

this

thinking neglects the key finding in numerous studies that a wide base of knowledge is more important than early specialization.

Moreover

teachers

can potentially be a crucial influence on their pupils. Most adults are grateful to at least one teacher who serves as a lifelong role model.

This

is because students can connect with a teacher emotionally and intellectually.

For example

, a teacher may introduce and elucidate a number of great thinkers and writers that later shape a student’s political or moral philosophy.

By providing

Change preposition

Providing

show examples

greater funding for

teachers

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

simply ensures that more qualified

teachers

will apply for jobs.

Additionally

teachers

who are passionate about their work and are underpaid at the moment, are likely to feel more motivated and appreciated with higher salaries. In conclusion, those who argue in

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

computers

are short-sighted as

teachers

have

greater

Add an article

a greater

show examples

overall impact. Naturally, it is more difficult to measure and study the value of quality

teachers

and provide definitive evidence for

this

viewpoint.

Submitted by kadirov.sattor755 on Sun Jul 31 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Some people think that the government should fund music, dance and arts lessons for children. Others think that they should be funded by private businesses or by children's families. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Discuss both views and give your opinio