IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Tourism is always a force for good which enables people of different countries to understand each other. To what extend do you agree with this idea?

#tourism #force #people #countries #idea
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In
fact
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,fact
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tourism
 industry has been playing an important role in nations` understanding
toward
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of
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 each other around the world. I absolutely agree that
this
 trend has benefits for all people as well as governments.
First
 of all, when visitors come to
host
Correct article usage
the host
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country
 and expose to the stunning historical places and amazing
sight-seeing
Correct your spelling
sightseeing
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 of that
country
, they are highly likely to change their misunderstanding that they have from the past data.
That is
,
this
 cognition not only
encourage
Correct subject-verb agreement
encourages
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 them to come to
this
 region more, but it
also
 makes them
to
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apply
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respect
to
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apply
show examples
this
 nation`s culture and religion. Take my
home land
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homeland
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 –Iran- which does not have
international
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an international
the international
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 positive name in the world as an example; the more tourists know
Iran`s
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about Iran`s
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 great civilization, the more they tend to build
long-term
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a long-term
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friendship
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friendships
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 with
Iranian
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Iranians
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.
As a result
,
that is
 an effective way to clear our intentions and facilitate cultural exchange with other nations across the globe which means globalization.
In addition
, some tourists and
tourism
 companies after purchasing goods from a
country
 go to the other countries and introduce those products to the other areas as well, so we can gain a big benefit from selling our merchandise.
This
 results
to
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in
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 a wealthy
country
 which affects
on
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apply
show examples
all aspects of our life.
For instance
, according to estimations in Australia, more than one billion money is annually obtained by
tourism
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the tourism
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 industry. It is difficult to conceive of vigorous economic growth without an efficient
tourism
 industry. To conclude,
although
 because of our religious beliefs my
home land
Correct your spelling
homeland
show examples
 has
isolated
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been isolated
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 in the world to some
extend
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extent
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, I believe by absorbing visitors from other places we are able to introduce our culture and precious resources respectfully to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other nations.
Submitted by m2010.science on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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