IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Pollution of air, water and soil has become critical in last years and it takes millions of years to recoup. What are the main causes of pollution? How can we tackle this problem individually and globally?

#pollution #air #water #soil #years #millions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the
last
Linking Words
 years, our planet has
Change the verb form
experienced
show examples
experience
Correct your spelling
experienced
show examples
 a long list of environmental pollution problems that million years will be taken to compensate
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 resulted consequences. I am certainly
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the opinion that human activities for extending their own life and scientific capabilities are the major contributions to these
disastres
Correct your spelling
disasters
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, several individual and global solutions will be elucidated. On the one hand, using
Use synonyms
plastic made
Add a hyphen
plastic-made
show examples
 materials, which have been produced by
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
 owing to
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 cost-
efective
Correct your spelling
effective
 nature,
likely
Add a missing verb
is likely
show examples
 to be
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 important contribution to pollution problems. Since
plastic
Use synonyms
 materials cannot decompose and become a part of the environment, they have a detrimental effect on the area where they are discarded.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
enormous
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
 have been
producing
Wrong verb form
produced
show examples
 by car factories led to
release
Correct article usage
the release
show examples
a
Change preposition
of a
show examples
huge amount of fuel combustion
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the air. These harmful
Add a hyphen
carbon-based
show examples
carbon based
Add a hyphen
carbon-based
show examples
 gases bring
Correct your spelling
severe
several
sevelar
Correct your spelling
severe
 consequences for our planet
for instance
Linking Words
ozun
Correct your spelling
ozone
 layer depletion and so forth.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that government and individuals both have a
responsibilities
Correct the article-noun agreement
responsibility
show examples
 to address these issues.
Firstly
Linking Words
 harshly fines should be legislated
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
 and any other
campanies
Correct your spelling
companies
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
 contributing to air pollution.
Similarly
Linking Words
, several laws should be passed so
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
penalize the use of
plastic
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all over the world.
Such
Linking Words
 laws need to be implemented
an
Correct your spelling
at
show examples
 a national level and immediate steps should be taken by the central government to address
this
Linking Words
 situation. To conclude, based on what has
mentioned
Add a missing verb
been mentioned
show examples
thus
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
far
show examples
for
Correct your spelling
far
show examples
,
plastic
Use synonyms
 usage and fuel
combustions
Fix the agreement mistake
combustion
show examples
 were introduced as
major
Add an article
a major
the major
show examples
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
 of our
planet
Change noun form
planet's
show examples
pollutions
Fix the agreement mistake
pollution
show examples
, and two strict
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions
show examples
 that should be passed by central governments were proposed.
Submitted by ehsan_rahim66 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: