Technology has more positive than negative effects on our relationships with other people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#technology #effects #relationships #people

this

modern time,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technology

-driven communication plays one of the most crucial roles in our

life

Moreover

, individuals rely so much on the gadgets

such

as smartphones, tablets, computers and other electrical devices to build relationships with the people in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

This

essay will articulate both views along with my opinion that the innovative

technology

not only helps improve the network in the community but

also

creates side effects if human beings make use of it in the wrong ways.

Firstly

, advanced automation has smoothed our communication with global

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

both

Change preposition

apply

show examples

socially and economically.

For instance

, it can be widely seen that businessmen are able to conduct meetings with their partners virtually and effectively through Zoom video conferencing or other applications as long as there is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reliable internet and modern devices.

Furthermore

, we easily contact

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

our friends and family who are

Change preposition

apply

show examples

oversea with a click on our smartphones or laptops.

Hence

this

makes

crystal

Correct pronoun usage

it crystal

show examples

clear that the innovation of

technology

has been an essential part of our daily

life

if it is utilized in a useful way.

On the contrary

, there are

also

some drawbacks and cases

as a result

of making friends online and excessively spending time online than

real

Change preposition

in real

show examples

life

. To exemplify

this

, nowadays, we have seen and heard the news from the newspaper or television that people who are using Facebook and other social

medias

Correct your spelling

media

show examples

are cheated by being persuaded to believe that someone they have met online

are

Change the verb form

show examples

rich and they end up transferring cash to the strangers.

Likewise

, the youngsters end up wasting their time

Correct your spelling

in front

infront

Correct your spelling

in front

of the computer screen by playing online games and not

enjoy

Wrong verb form

enjoying

show examples

their social

life

with their friends and families face-to-face.

Therefore

, their relationships with their loved ones are getting worse. To summarise, our human beings do have great benefit from the innovated

technology

, but

this

can only make our relationship stronger and better only if we know how to take the advantage of it.

Thus

, we should always be mindful to balance our virtual world with the help of

technology

and our outside world with our society.

Submitted by nannphongnoan on Wed Aug 03 2022

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

354 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

technological advancements
digital communication
instant messaging
social media platforms
virtual connections
long-distance relationships
cultural diversity
online interactions
cyberbullying
in-person interaction
emotional intimacy
cybersecurity
reliance on technology

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Technology has more positive than negative effects on our relationships with other people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people today are choosing to travel to other countries. Why is that happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a professional fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

The diagram details the process of making smoked fish

Some people think that the government should establish free libraries in each town. Others, however, believe that it is a waste of money since the public can use the Internet at home to obtain information. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In some countries, secondary schools aim to provide a general education across a range of subjects. In others, children focus on a narrow range of subjects related to a particular career. Which do you think is appropriate in today’s world?