In some countries, marriages are arranged by the parents but in other cases, people choose their own marriage partners. Discuss both systems and state which you think is better.

Marriage is a crucial factor for a success of a person.
Therefore
,
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
involvement
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
the marriage would happen in some countries, especially in Asian countries.
However
, some people find their partner by
them self
Correct your spelling
themself
themselves
show examples
. Throughout
this
essay, I will explore both ways and express my own opinion on the matter.
Firstly
, I will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the weddings
arrange
Wrong verb form
arranged
show examples
by parents and
secondly
Add a comma
,secondly
show examples
I will share my idea regarding people, who find their better half by
them self
Correct your spelling
themself
themselves
show examples
. Mostly, people married
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
young ages
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between twenty to thirty. Those ages are too small to take a serious
Correct your spelling
decision
decission
Correct your spelling
decision
.
Although
, if someone
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
wrong partner, life
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
a mess for him or her. Parents are aware
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
those
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their experience.
Therefore
, they may find
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
right person for their child.
Otherthan
Correct your spelling
Other than
that,
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
know the attitude of their child from birth.
This
will make
easier
Correct pronoun usage
it easier
show examples
for them to select a good guardian. Somehow, no one can guarantee the choice of the
parent
because there was some incident cited by newspapers that some children disappoint regarding their
parent
decision. Children may not happy after they are married due to the wrong choice of the
parent
.
This
may be the cause
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
the divorce. In conclusion, even if
parent
involvement makes good, there may be some bad impact. In my opinion, considering both parties will be much more beneficial rather than concerning the executing
Submitted by amilawelikala99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: