IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists rather than local people. Why is this? What can be done to encourage local people to visit museums and historical sites?

#museums #sites #tourists #people #visit
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Most
of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourist
places
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 have many museums as well as
sites
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 of historical relevance.
However
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,
such
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places
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 are majorly visited by foreign visitors rather than the
localites
Correct your spelling
localities
locality
.
This
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 essay intends to discuss the reasons behind
this
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 phenomenon, and suggest some ways to ameliorate
this
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 problem before drawing a reasonable conclusion. To commence with, there are myriad
of
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reasons why
majority
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the majority
a majority
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 of visitors prefer to go to historical
sites
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.
The
Correct article usage
First
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first
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 and foremost is that they are fascinated by these new
places
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 and in order to explore and learn more about the culture of the host country they pay a visit to these
places
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. Local individuals,
on the other hand
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, do not have anything extraordinary to view at
such
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sites
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 and museums as they do not undergo regular upgradation.
As a result
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, they find it sheer wastage of their money. Moving
further
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, several steps can be taken to influence local people to go to
sites
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 with historical relevance. The
first
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 step could be providing free-of-cost entry to individuals belonging to nearby areas.
For instance
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, the Art
museum
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Museum
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 in sector 10 Chandigarh, invites students from local schools to visit it without charging any money.
This
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 attracts children's parents as well.
Moreover
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, historical
sites
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 should be maintained and renovated from time to time so that residents of local areas visit them more often. In conclusion, I reiterate that
although
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 historical monuments and museums attract more visitors because they do not undergo regular changes, still authorities can attract local people
also
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 by improving these
places
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 and providing free entry on specific days.
Submitted by Pablagurseerat on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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